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墨書 Inktalez
Recently, I found myself in a predicament, having been taken to the police station. Bored and restless, I pondered a pressing question:
Was it time to light some incense?
As luck would have it, Officer Xiao Fu had been reassigned to the New South Precinct, and his first case there was none other than mine.
This time, I wasn't arrested for prostitution but rather for participating in a brawl.
The combatants included a company CEO—my rather rotund Sugar Daddy—his legitimate wife, and me, the third party in this marriage, the mistress entangled in this affair.
The situation escalated into a fight largely due to the Main Wife's formidable presence. She rallied a group of people, threatening to take down us "dog lovers."
Left with no choice, my Sugar Daddy called in company security to settle the score. However, as the fighting ensued, someone reported us, and before we knew it, we were all hauled off to the police station.
Xiao Fu was all business this time, wearing a serious expression and not sparing me even a glance.
Surprisingly, I felt no pressure at all. Instead, I embraced the moment and got into character. Suddenly, I found myself half-kneeling on the ground before the Main Wife, saying:
"Madam, I'm not here to break up your family; I'm here to join it."
The Main Wife's face turned an alarming shade of green with rage as she raised her hand to slap me. I thought that taking a hit would add authenticity to my performance.
But unexpectedly, Xiao Fu stepped in swiftly and blocked her.
"Do you think this is a marketplace? What a racket! Everyone, please be serious."
I stole a glance at Xiao Fu and smiled, feeling that my white moonlight had returned with a vengeance.
Later, the police suggested a private settlement. The parties involved in the fight assessed the situation, and it was decided that the Doomed Couple would cover the expenses to send everyone else away, leaving just the three of us.
At this moment, the Main Wife rarely showed a vulnerable expression, crying out, "I want a divorce."
My eyes instantly lit up as I tugged at Sugar Daddy's arm, shaking it back and forth. The older man clearly didn't take it seriously, thinking his nagging wife was just throwing a tantrum. Just as he was about to speak,
I couldn't help but jump in at a critical moment and said on behalf of Sugar Daddy, "I just made the mistake that all men in the world make. Please forgive me, my wife."
Sugar Daddy looked at me in shock, and I continued to mimic his tone, saying, "Wife, you stand strong at home. Don't worry; I've had twelve flings this month, but I will still come home."
Finally, Sugar Daddy caught on and started pointing at me with disbelief.
I made a dismissive gesture and said to Main Wife, "Madam, I recognize my mistakes and can change. Turning back is the way to safety. I've already sent evidence of those twelve wildflowers to your email; you can go ahead and file for divorce."
"You, you, you!" Sugar Daddy pointed at me and then at his wife, looking utterly incredulous.
After watching my performance, Main Wife dropped her act. With an assertive gesture of her hands, she indicated that she would discuss the divorce proceedings with her lawyer.
Sugar Daddy seemed ready to explode; he called someone and smashed a cup from the police station before storming off. Once he left, I turned to Main Wife seriously and said, "Let's settle the final payment."
Main Wife nodded readily and lowered her head to make the transfer.
I glanced at Xiao Fu, who was discussing watching a play nearby, and pointed at him, saying:
"Madam, you need to add some money for my emotional distress. This officer beside me has been the object of my secret admiration for nearly ten years, and today he really made a fool of himself!"
The madam, feeling quite good about her prospects of divorce and asset division, turned to look at Xiao Fu, whose face was flushed all the way to his ears, and nodded in agreement: "I'll give you an extra 5%."
In my excitement, I hugged Xiao Fu and said, "Today is lucky; I’ve made enough to break even."
Xiao Fu pushed me away and whispered in my ear:
"Lin Yu Tang, you think you've gained a lot, but have you considered what you've lost?"
His expression was cold as he pointed to the computer nearby, which displayed surveillance footage of the fight, perfectly capturing the moment I kicked someone.
With a deadpan face, Xiao Fu stated, "The victim has already left and refuses mediation. According to public security regulations, you'll be detained for eight hours."
I was taken aback, thinking that my white moonlight truly had something wrong with his head. Before I could react, he dragged me into a holding cell and cuffed me to the iron frame on the wall.
"Hey, Fang Xiaofu, are you out of your mind?" I exclaimed angrily.
With a righteous expression, Xiao Fu gritted his teeth and replied, "Lin Yu Tang, you're just asking for it. Do you think the police station is a place for playing house?" With that, he slammed the door behind him.
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