Six years ago, in The Blossoming Age, I made a marriage pact with Gu Heng, filled with dreams for the future.
At that time, I was innocent and carefree, believing this engagement was a gift from heaven, a bridge to happiness.
I remember that year when the peach blossoms bloomed exceptionally bright, their pink petals falling like rain, covering my shoulders and Gu Heng's blue robe.
He smiled at me and said, "Ayu, when you come of age, I will marry you."
To me, Gu Heng was the best man in the world.
Now that I have come of age, those sweet memories feel like a poisonous thorn, piercing me all over.
What once brought me joy now cuts through my heart like sharp blades.
I have "awakened."
I find myself within a storybook, and I am the cruel female antagonist ultimately abandoned by fate.
Fate, you truly love to play tricks.
Gu Heng, my childhood friend, whose care for me made me mistakenly believe it was my own tenderness.
He would drape a thick cloak over me on cold winter days and fan me on hot summer afternoons.
He patiently taught me how to read and write, played hide-and-seek with me, and kept vigil by my side when I fell ill.
In my youth, I misinterpreted this care as affection, and my heart fell hopelessly for him.
I was like a moth drawn to a flame that seemed warm and inviting.
My feelings for him, from admiration to infatuation, run deep within my bones.
They entwine around my heart like vines, suffocating me and leaving me unable to break free.
I remember my childhood, when Gu Heng and my sister Xie Yu played the roles of celestial lovers. I cried and insisted that I wanted to marry Gu Heng.
At that time, my sister Xie Yu wore a flowing white dress, while Gu Heng donned a dark robe. Together, they looked like a perfect pair.
I cried out, "I want to marry Brother Gu Heng too!"
Gu Heng did not refuse; he gently called me "Little Lady" and tied a red string around my wrist. Thus began my yearning.
I have treasured that red string all these years; it is my most beautiful memory from youth and now my deepest pain.
On the day of the Shangyuan Festival, when I came of age, the lanterns flickered in the night. I stumbled upon Gu Heng and Xie Yu whispering under the moonlight, their gestures intimate.
The moonlight that night was particularly bright, illuminating both Gu Heng's and Xie Yu's faces, as well as the affection between them.
Hand in hand, they spoke softly to each other, as if the entire world consisted only of the two of them.
The maid's comments—"Miss, look! The young master and young lady are truly a match made in heaven!"—struck me like a resounding slap, waking me from my dream.
The maid's voice was not loud, yet it thundered in my mind like a bolt of lightning.
The Gu Heng I had longed for, the unique tenderness I believed was mine alone, turned out to be nothing more than a self-directed solo performance.
I felt like a fool, kept in the dark while still lost in my own fantasies.
My world came crashing down.
I felt as if my heart had shattered into countless pieces, never to be whole again.
The flames of jealousy spread within me, turning the once sweet memories into bitter ashes.
I hated Xie Yu for stealing my brother Gu Heng away from me.
I also hated Gu Heng for giving me hope, only to destroy it with his own hands.
But more than anything, I hated myself—hated my naivety, hated my foolishness.
I clenched my fists tightly, my nails digging deep into my flesh, yet I felt no pain at all.
I told myself that I could not continue to sink like this; I had to change my fate.
I would no longer be the wicked supporting character abandoned by destiny.
I would become the master of my own fate.
Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm the turmoil within me.
I lifted my head and gazed at the bright moon, determination shining in my eyes.
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