I shouted until my voice was hoarse.
Why, why didn’t I use his guilt before to make him do more things?
Why, why did I only think about escaping the palace, escaping from his side?
I regret it.
But it seems like it's too late.
On my birthday, my body rapidly deteriorated.
I coughed up blood.
Yet I felt that if I could die today, my family would only have to mourn once every year on my birthday.
Just once.
That’s better than having to pay respects twice a year during Qingming and Zhongyuan.
I am filial.
I closed my eyes, waiting for death to come.
In a daze, I heard a familiar voice.
“Sang Yi, don’t leave me.”
“We live together and die together.”
Liangqiu Hongxin tightly grasped my hand, crying like a child.
He trembled as he took out a gold ring from his pocket.
He wanted to place it on my ring finger.
But no matter how he tried, the ring kept slipping off.
My body was too thin, just skin and bones, unable to bear the weight of the ring.
He cried and said, “Sang Yi, I truly love you.”
“How could I not love you?”
"You are so vibrant, so passionate, so in love with me."
"We were once so happy together."
"Sang Yi, don't leave me, I beg you."
I slowly opened my eyes, my vision somewhat blurred.
"You..."
Each word I spoke took immense effort.
"You... get... away..."
I had never bowed my head to anyone.
When he no longer cherished me, I did not surrender.
When he took everything from me, I did not beg for mercy.
But that time, I pleaded with him, begged him not to take my cat away.
He did not agree.
It was I who died.
"It was you..."
"It was you... who killed me."
"You... do not deserve... to say... you love me."
He shook his head desperately, tears splattering.
"No, no, Sang Yi, I didn't mean it."
"I was just, I was just too angry."
"I just wanted you to soften up."
"Sang Yi, I was wrong, I truly was wrong."
"I shouldn't have treated you that way."
"Sang Yi, wake up, please wake up."
"As long as you wake up, I will do anything for you."
"Sang Yi, I beg you, love me one more time."
"Sang Yi..."
My vision became increasingly blurry, to the point where I could no longer see his face.
The voice in my ears grew fainter, almost inaudible.
Only the soft meowing of a cat became clearer and clearer.
It must be here to take me away.
Only it would lead me away.
"Liangqiu Hongxin..."
I used all my strength to utter my last words.
"I... don't love... you anymore."
"I... only feel... disgusted... by you."
"I... beg... you..."
"Never... in this life... or the next... see me again..."
I closed my eyes and could no longer open them.
He shook my body frantically.
"Sang Yi, wake up, wake up!"
"Don't sleep, don't sleep!"
"I beg you, just look at me one more time, just look at me one more time!"
Awei burned my Sick Cat to ashes and placed it in my coffin.
I have completed my last wish.
My Father has come.
He came to the palace to resign from Liangqiu Hongxin.
He said he no longer wants to be the Duke of State.
He also does not want to guard the borders for Great Qi anymore.
He said he has only two children.
He said he is getting old and wants to retire and go home to enjoy his old age.
He spoke a lot.
The last sentence was, "My daughter is gone, Your Majesty, my daughter is gone!"
"Do you know how much I loved my daughter?"
"I held her in my palms for fear of dropping her, I cherished her for fear of losing her; the daughter I raised with so much effort is just gone!"
"Your Majesty, have you seen the scars on Sang Yi's arm?"
"She made those cuts herself with a hairpin!"
"She was afraid of being seen, so she cut her arm, one line after another, blood and flesh all mixed together!"
"She didn’t dare tell anyone else; she only dared to tell me."
"Your Majesty, have you seen the scars on her arm?"
"Do you know why she harmed herself?"
My Father wiped away a tear, choking back his sobs.
"She harmed herself because she no longer wanted to live!"
"She no longer wanted to live, Your Majesty!"
"She no longer wanted to live, Your Majesty!"
My Father shouted with a heart-wrenching cry.
"I tried my best to keep her alive, but she didn't want to live!"
"Your Majesty, do you know?"
"It's all your fault, you caused her death!"
My father left the palace with my coffin and returned to the Frontier.
My brother did not come to see me off.
Because he was feigning death on the battlefield and was on his way to the Frontier.
He couldn't let anyone know he was still alive.
The Fierce General of Great Qi was gradually fading away, and my brother had become the pillar of support.
The Border Defense had fallen.
Two years later, the imperial city was also breached.
The enemy troops searched the imperial city and found Liangqiu Hongxin.
He couldn't even escape.
He died in a hasty manner in the Consort's chamber.
At the time of his death, he tightly held a blood-stained pouch and a gold ring.
It is said that he spent a large sum of money to obtain that gold ring from a Master.
It could bring the dead back to life.
How ridiculous.
Truly ridiculous.
Is there such a thing in this world?
If there were, how could my mother and I have died?
The enemy troops confiscated his belongings.
His corpse was discarded in a mass grave and was torn apart by wild dogs.
My brother said that when he died, there was no one by his side.
How pitiful.
My brother said that when he died, he kept crying and murmuring my name.
He said, "Sang Yi, I love you."
He said, "Sang Yi, don't go."
He said, "Sang Yi, I beg you, love me one more time."
How ridiculous.
It's truly absurd.
My Father raised herds of cattle and sheep in a desolate place far from civilization.
Every day, they bleat in front of my grave.
My Father said this is to comfort my wandering soul.
How laughable.
It's really laughable!
I no longer care about these things.
I have already been reincarnated.
I have long forgotten the past.
I only vaguely feel that the events of my previous life are like a dream.
A dream I never want to recall again.
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