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墨書 Inktalez
Ah Yin looked at herself in the mirror, still with the big eyes from ten years ago, but there were now wrinkles at the corners of her eyes, and her gaze was not as clear as before. Her skin was still fair, but after ten years of alcohol soaking, she had developed quite a few pimples on her face. Ah Yin hardly ever did any skincare or makeup, and her skin's condition fluctuated. When she applied BB cream, she still looked like a girl in her twenties from a distance. Ah Yin liked to wear cheongsam, with a bust of 78, a waist of 67, and hips of 87. Although not perfectly curvaceous, she still carried the word "exquisite" well. Coupled with ten years of career training, Ah Yin had refined her temperament to be gentle and dignified. Looking at herself in the mirror, Ah Yin said, "XX, would you die without a man?"
Indeed, her husband was 175cm tall, weighed 140 pounds, and had a very standard figure. When he was young, he was the heartthrob of their school, and he was also well-endowed. However, Ah Yin had never experienced what sex was like when she was young, and she had always had a psychological aversion to marital life. After being "developed" by Ah Lin, she felt that her husband was truly the best sexual partner, purely from a physiological standpoint. When she first started dating her husband, Ah Yin had feelings of love at first sight for the first month, but later on, she was always in a state of conflict and contradiction. It was only because her husband said, "I will treat your parents as my own and take care of them," that Ah Yin was moved and decided to marry him. Now, does Ah Yin have any problems getting along with her husband? Apart from not being able to chat for long, everything else is almost in harmony. When there are no clients or Ah Lin, her husband has said that they are as compatible as a cup and a lid.
The client was probably around 180cm tall, with a slender figure and a refined demeanor. He had never even held hands with Ah Yin. When he said, "We are the same kind of people," Ah Yin suddenly felt like Cupid's arrow had struck her, but it also made her taste the pain of heartbreak, the kind of heart-wrenching feeling. He should be the person who hurt Ah Yin the most.
Ah Lin is estimated to be around 165cm tall, with a slender figure and a very clean temperament. He should be the most affectionate person to Ah Yin so far. With him, Ah Yin feels what it's like to be in a passionate relationship with someone of the same age. His words "I don't know why I'm so good to you" deeply moved Ah Yin. Even if Ah Lin were to hurt her one day, Ah Yin probably wouldn't blame him, especially since Ah Yin feels she has developed imm the company y from her previous experiences. Why does Ah Yin feel so reluctant to let go of Ah Lin? Firstly, Ah Yin and Ah Lin have known each other for 8 years, not 8 months. Secondly, Ah Lin has genuinely helped Ah Yin when she needed it the most, whether in her work or when she was unable to get over her emotions for a client last year. Thirdly, Ah Yin always feels that Ah Lin's feelings for her are not just physical, although in extramarital affairs, physical desire probably accounts for 99% of it. Fourthly, what would Ah Yin lose without Ah Lin? In fact, Ah Lin asked Ah Yin, "What would you lose if you stopped contacting me?" At that time, Ah Yin said, "At most, I would lose you as a person. After all, I only know your name, work the company, and home address. I don't know anything else about you." Ah Lin was sweating after hearing this. What would Ah Yin lose without Ah Lin? She would lose the daily greetings, the person she could talk to about work problems, and what else? In fact, as long as Ah Yin tells Ah Lin that she wants to return to her family, Ah Lin probably wouldn't try to pursue her anymore. Now Ah Yin always feels that after working so hard for so many years, what harm would it do to be greedy and selfish once? Ah Yin is conflicted. On one hand, she feels guilty towards her family, but on the other hand, she is afraid to tell Ah Lin her true thoughts. So Ah Yin came to the post seeking help, but in reality, the only one who can help Ah Yin is herself. If she can resist contacting Ah Lin, her life will return to peace. However, human greed or the desire for beautiful things will always make Ah Yin unable to control herself and want to reach out.
After writing this post, Ah Yin increasingly feels that she cannot continue like this with Ah Lin. She told Ah Lin that her husband probably already suspects her of having an affair and is watching her more closely, so they may not have a chance to meet again in the future. Ah Lin didn't reply, and that feeling of loss made Ah Yin want to hold on to Ah Lin again.
Ah Lin sent a link to Ah Yin, "Good upbringing is related to family influence, not family background." Perhaps Ah Yin had previously mentioned her husband's family situation to Ah Lin, and Ah Lin feels that Ah Yin's husband's current character and temperament are related to his family influence.
Ah Yin: Are you angry?
Ah Lin: No.
Ah Yin: Let's meet again when we have the chance.
Ah Lin did not reply.
The next day was Sunday. Normally, Ah Lin would send a WeChat message to Ah Yin to say hello, but that day, Ah Lin didn't send anything.
Ah Yin: Ah Lin, it's been a while.
Ah Lin replied: What's wrong?
Ah Yin: Just replying is good enough.
Ah Lin: What the heck?
Ah Yin felt happy in his heart, knowing that Ah Lin would still contact him.
The third day was Monday. Normally, Ah Yin would receive a WeChat message from Ah Lin as soon as he woke up, but that day, he didn't receive anything. The feeling of craving for contact with Ah Lin made Ah Yin really want to reach out to him.
Nine o'clock, ten o'clock, Ah Yin couldn't help it.
Ah Yin: Ah Lin
Ah Lin: What's wrong again?
Ah Yin: Feeling a bit uncomfortable.
Ah Lin: Are you thirsty?
Ah Yin posted a silly smile.
Ah Lin didn't reply.
Off work, Ah Yin couldn't help it again.
Ah Yin: You won't ignore me, will you? Still no reply.
Ah Yin: We have feelings for each other, right?
Ah Lin: My mom had surgery today, please don't disturb.
Ah Yin: I'm sorry.
At that moment, Ah Yin felt hurt, really, just like when a client said before, "Let's not contact each other in the future," it hurt.
Ah Lin: You are just being dramatic.
Ah Yin did not reply.
The next day at 6:30, Ah Lin's WeChat appeared right on time.
At this moment, Ah Yin's heart doesn't seem as eager as before, but she also can't bear not to reply to Ah Lin. Ah Yin always remembers the scene of herself eagerly looking for Ah Lin that day, and she doesn't want Ah Lin to wait for her WeChat reply eagerly like she does. That day, Ah Yin was a bit busy, so her WeChat replies weren't as timely as before.
Ah Lin: Where are you?
Ah Lin: Are you deliberately not replying to me?
Ah Yin: With a client, busy
The two flirted as usual, but at that moment, what was Ah Yin's mood like? It wasn't as ecstatic as before, and she seemed to be cautious as if afraid of getting hurt.
On the third and fourth day, the two of them continued to flirt as usual.
Ah Lin: You seem quite calm these past two days.
Ah Yin: Afraid of getting addicted.
Ah Lin: Afraid you won't feel anything for your husband?
Ah Yin: No
On the fifth day, Ah Yin was in her safe period. To be honest, Ah Yin was craving Ah Lin in her body. When she was having intimate moments with her husband, she had to fantasize about being with Ah Lin to reach climax. As they flirted, Ah Lin said he wanted Ah Yin. Ah Yin started to feel that Ah Lin...
I picked up this post again today. I think it's better to see it through to the end. Firstly, it's a matter of self-accountability. Secondly, it helps to relieve the impulse to find Ah Lin. Thirdly, after seeing the heartwarming ending, I understand more and more that men and women's thought processes are indeed different. For men, it's mostly about physical desire, while for women, they always like to immerse themselves in their own fantasies of emotions, whether it's love or other emotions. Perhaps this is the fundamental difference between men's rationality and women's emotions. There may be some descriptions of sexual love in the depiction process, perhaps this is just what hypertension said, that sexual love between husband and wife is just a game.
As mentioned earlier, after the first time with Ah Lin, I felt for the first time what it means to be completely immersed in passion. Let me describe the feeling of having an affair. It's not about the size or performance, but more about the sensation - the stimulating feeling that makes one more emotionally and physically involved in lovemaking. Because there are no other distractions, combined with the stimulation of hormones, the feeling of climax is completely different from that of reaching climax with a spouse. Perhaps this is what the ancients meant when they said: "A wife is not as good as a concubine, a concubine is not as good as an affair, an affair is not as good as an unattainable one." But in the stage of being unattainable, that kind of heart-wrenching feeling is probably only understood by those who have experienced it. In fact, the subsequent pain is also unforgettable.
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