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墨書 Inktalez
When I returned home, the living room was dimly lit.
By the light of the moon, I saw an unfinished painting on the easel.
The girl was wearing a pink down jacket, with her hair in a bun, her smile radiant and her eyes clear.
It was Meng Shasha.
My heart tightened painfully, as if someone had gripped it tightly, almost suffocating me.
Fifteen years ago, I met Lu Jingtian in high school.
He was my deskmate, and I was his Xiao Inn.
He always protected me, preventing me from being bullied by classmates.
He lived in the city while I came from a poor rural background.
Yet we fell in love, uncontrollably drawn to each other.
After the college entrance examination, he chose to attend an art academy while I went to a good school in the south.
The days apart were lonely and long.
Every night, I lay in bed staring at the ceiling,
imagining what he was doing, who he was meeting, and what he was saying.
I missed him like crazy and often suffered from insomnia all night long.
During every video call, I looked at him on the screen, always having endless things to say.
He called me chatty, and I said he was my oxygen.
We called each other every day, sent texts, made video calls, sharing our lives.
He would send me every painting so that I could be the first to appreciate them.
I would read every article to him so that he would be the first to know.
After ten years of long-distance love, we never grew tired of each other; instead, our longing deepened.
The year we graduated, he came to find me.
We embraced tightly and kissed as if we wanted to merge into one another's bodies.
I asked him, "You love me so much; what if one day you no longer want me? What should I do?"
He cupped my face and gently wiped away my tears:
"Fool, I wouldn't want to be without you."
"I loved you for ten years, so I will love you for a lifetime."
I laughed and punched his chest lightly, "Why is your mouth so sweet?"
"Because I've eaten too much sugar."
"When did you eat it?"
"When I saw you."
He held my hand and leaned down to kiss me, "Li Ying, you are my sugar."
I smiled sweetly, feeling incredibly happy inside.
At that moment, I truly believed that Lu Jingtian loved me very much,
that we would be together until death separated us.
But now, death has not yet come, and he has already let go of my hand.
I tore the painting into pieces, the shards scattered everywhere,
just like our broken relationship.
I sat alone on the sofa all night, thinking.
Thinking about our past, thinking about our present, thinking about our future...
At seven in the morning, Lu Jingtian returned.
He carried a faint fragrance, the scent of Meng Shasha.
He was surprised to see me sitting on the sofa, "Why are you up so early?"
"I couldn't sleep."
I replied calmly, "Do you have something to say?"
He was silent for a moment before speaking, "Li Ying, I'm sorry, I..."
"Why do you need to say sorry?"
I looked up at him, my eyes red, "You haven't done anything wrong."
He sighed, "I know; I'm sorry for you."
"But I'm serious about Sasha."
"Serious?"
I chuckled lightly, "To what extent are you serious?"
"She is my Muse, my confidante."
Lu Jingtian had a devout expression, his tone earnest:
"We share similar interests; we talk about art, life, and ideals."
"She reignited my passion for creation."
"Li Ying, meeting her made me realize what it means to feel a spark."
"In the past, being with you was just a habit; there was no love."
I nodded, "I understand."
"She is your Muse, and you are her wallet, right?"
Lu Jingtian's expression darkened: "Don't speak so harshly."
"Sasha is not that kind of person."
"Is she not?"
I sneered, "Lu Jingtian, I think you're the one who isn't human."
"Meng Shasha is only twenty years old, the prime of her youth. What kind of man does she want that she would choose a married one like you?"
"Isn't she just after your money?"
Lu Jingtian replied coldly, "Your interest in my money doesn't mean others are too."
"Ten years ago, I had nothing, yet you were still with me."
"Now that I've reached the peak again after ten years, am I supposed to abandon you?"
"Li Ying, one shouldn't have double standards."
I was left speechless by his retort, trembling with anger.
He was right; ten years ago, he had nothing and I still followed him.
But now, ten years later, he had everything and yet wanted to abandon me.
I suddenly felt ridiculous.
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