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墨書 Inktalez
Ruan Ji
Era: Wei-Jin Period
Place of Origin: the Wei of Chenliu (present-day Henan)
Occupation: Nominal Official, Writer
Special Skills: Writing Satirical Texts, Discussing Metaphysics, Long Howling, Rolling Eyes
Major Works: The Biography of Mr. Daren
Hobbies: Fine Wine, Beautiful Women
Similar Comedians: Liu Ling
During a banquet held in the court, Ruan Ji, who held a nominal position, also attended to indulge in food and drink. He encountered a judicial official reporting a case of someone who had killed their mother.
Ruan Ji interjected, "Ha! Killing one's father is one thing, but how can one kill their own mother?"
Upon hearing this, everyone was stunned.
Sima Zhao immediately rebuked him, saying, "Killing one's father is also an unforgivable crime; how can you say it is acceptable?"
Ruan Ji calmly defended himself, "Beasts know their mothers but do not know their fathers. Those who kill their fathers are like beasts, while those who kill their mothers are even worse than beasts."
The people present were left speechless.
Ruan Ji, who disregarded the teachings of propriety, could be considered a "youthful rebel" of his time, often looking down on the "gentlemen of etiquette" with disdain. He employed "dark humor," rarely spoke, but when he did, his words were laced with sarcasm.
Ruan Ji's behavior was eccentric. Upon hearing the news of his mother's death while playing chess, he continued to finish the game as if nothing had happened and then drank two dou of wine, vomiting several liters of blood.
He noticed a beautiful woman from the neighboring house selling wine and began to ingratiate himself with her daily. When drunk, he would lie down by the wine stall like a pile of mud. From his expressions of mourning and love, he could be seen as a pioneer of absurd performance art.
Su Shi
[Era: Northern Song
Hometown: Meizhou Meishan (now part of Sichuan) Profession: Official (but frequently exiled) Specialty: Poetry, calligraphy, and painting
Major Works: "Nian Nu Jiao: Chibi Huai Gu"
Hobbies: Gourmet food, satire
Similar Comedians: Fo Yin]
Due to the "Wutai Poetry Case," Su Shi was arrested in Huzhou, and as he was being escorted to the capital for trial, his friends and family bid him farewell in tears.
In this moment of uncertainty between life and death, Su Shi told a humorous story to lighten the mood: During the reign of Emperor Zhenzong of Song, he sought out hermits across the land. One named Yang Pu was quite famous for his poetry, but when summoned, he claimed he could not compose poetry.
Emperor Zhenzong then asked him, "When you were about to leave, did anyone write a poem for you?"
Yang Pu replied, "Only my concubine wrote one—'Do not indulge in wine and despair; do not be reckless in your love for poetry. Today I am taken to the officials; this will surely end my old life.'"
The emperor laughed heartily upon hearing this and allowed him to return to his secluded life in the mountains.
Su Shi's story amused everyone present, and his friends and family watched him depart calmly. Throughout his life, Su Shi faced multiple exiles, including a banishment to Hainan, yet he always found joy amidst hardship and lived with grace and ease.
Su Shi was a true optimist; his boldness was as grand as the flowing Yangtze River. His humor reflected the interests and talents of a literati, embodying refined art. Unfortunately, throughout Chinese history, there have been too few officials like Su Shi—individuals with personality and talent who also cared for the common people.
Tang Yin
[Era: Ming Dynasty
Hometown: Wuxian (now part of Jiangsu)]
Occupation: Living by Selling Paintings
Special Skills: Painting, Calligraphy, Poetry
Major Work: Complete Works of Liu Ru the Layman
Hobbies: Socializing, Satirical Plays
Similar Comedians: Zhu Yunming
Tang Bohu and his friend Zhu Yunming traveled around, spending all their money, and then disguised themselves as Taoist priests seeking donations to beg for money at the Censorate.
When the officials tried to expel them, Tang Bohu confidently said, "Don't think we are mere vagabonds; we are here to raise funds for the renovation of Gusu Yuanmiao Temple. We usually associate with renowned scholars from all over the world; Tang Bohu and Zhu Yunming are our good friends with whom we exchange poetry."
To verify their claims, the Censor pointed to a nearby Ox Sleep Stone and asked them to compose a poem.
Tang and Zhu effortlessly took turns reciting lines and soon composed a seven-character regulated verse: "Strange rocks rise steeply among the clouds, cast away for years without a care. Moss grows thick from the rain's embrace, while vines weave through nostrils in the breeze. Not eating grass by the streamside, it's been hard to till the fields above since ancient times. How strange that the shepherd cannot raise his whip, as flute sounds hang low in the evening mist."
The Censor was very pleased upon hearing it and immediately wrote to the magistrates of Changzhou and Wuxian, requesting them to contribute five hundred gold coins for the temple's repairs. However, Tang Bohu and his companions were merely deceiving people; after receiving the money, they went off to indulge in food and entertainment, and within a few days, they squandered it all.
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