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墨書 Inktalez
What does it mean to have nothing? Wang Xu clearly had something to say, and I almost wanted to spill everything I knew about Deng Xiaomei, just to see if she really was the "nothing" he referred to.
But Deng Xiaomei and Wang Xu had known each other for less than three hundred days, while Wang Xu and I had been married for three years. The man sitting on the edge of the bed, sulking and refusing to look at me, seemed to be ready to give me up for Deng Xiaomei, just as I suspected.
The lingering grievance in my heart made my nose tingle. I sniffed, trying to calm myself down; it wasn't time yet... it wasn't time yet. I kept reminding myself.
I still held onto a glimmer of hope.
Perhaps seeing that I was genuinely angry, Wang Xu had stolen glances at me a few times. His expression relaxed as he walked over, standing behind me with his hands resting on my shoulders. "Zhuang Jun, what’s been going on with you these past few days? I'm not doubting your friend, but after you've been in such frequent contact with her, you’ve changed. It’s only natural for me to be suspicious."
I sniffed again and immediately denied Wang Xu's claim. "Miao Miao and I were together in college for four years; we know each other well and are the best of friends. What do you mean by saying we've been in such frequent contact now?"
Wang Xu frowned at this. "That was during college. What about after we got married? How many times have you two actually met? I'm not saying this to criticize you, Zhuang Jun, but you're too naive. Mu Miaomiao is different; she's too clever. Don’t let her lead you astray."
I hated that Wang Xu spoke about Miao Miao like that, but I felt guilty because what he said was true. After getting married and starting our own family, the time I could spend meeting Miao Miao had become increasingly limited.
If it weren't for this time when I needed her help, we wouldn't have been seeing each other so frequently these past couple of days.
In the end, Wang Xu and I were both engaging in similar wrongdoings: he was cheating on me outside while I was openly accepting help from Miao Miao under the guise of our friendship.
Lying in the same bed with Wang Xu, who had turned his back to sleep soundly, I stared at his back in a daze. After all these days, my mind still hadn’t cleared up much; I still hadn’t figured out what kind of outcome I wanted.
I wanted to see Deng Xiaomei. Once I did, I wanted to obtain evidence that was already on Deng Xiaomei's phone. But then what? What would happen between Wang Xu and me? Divorce? Continue pretending not to know and maintain this marriage?
Even if I took a step back and thought that I couldn't leave Wang Xu—if he had something going on with Deng Xiaomei—I could grit my teeth and endure it. But now that Deng Xiaomei was pregnant, I felt utterly powerless; there was no chance left for me.
This was precisely what terrified me the most: no matter how I chose, there would only be one outcome. The day Deng Xiaomei became pregnant had already determined our future.
How pitiful it was for me.
I didn’t know when I fell asleep. The next day when I woke up and checked my phone, it was nearly ten o'clock in the morning. Among the missed calls were one from Wang Xu and three from Mu Miaomiao.
I had slept so deeply that I hadn’t even heard the ringing.
After hesitating for a moment, I called Wang Xu first.
"Hey, dear, are you awake? You should sleep a bit more. You usually work so hard that you hardly get to sleep in. Mom won't come over for dinner today. What do you want to eat? Or... why don't you come to my office and have lunch with me?" Wang Xu said openly, as if he had prepared this script for a long time.
I declined, "No thanks, I'll just eat something casual. You go ahead and work; I’ll sleep a bit more."
"Alright, then you rest first. We'll talk tonight."
After hanging up, I tousled my messy hair and guessed that my mother-in-law was likely downstairs. Even if I did run into her, I could just say I was going home. Nowadays, neighbors hardly visit each other; if she went to the fourth or fifth floor, who would really remember?
Feeling sorry for myself for a few minutes, I returned the call to Miao Miao.
Miao Miao seemed busy; her voice on the other end was chaotic. "Hey, Zhuang Jun, do you have time tonight? Let's go out for dinner."
"What’s up?"
"Remember I said I'd help you find a job? Wang Nan has a friend who is an Overseas Returnee. He just took over his family business and needs an assistant. We’re going out for dinner tonight with Wang Nan. If you're free, come along; it’ll be nice to meet someone new and relax."
Suddenly reminded of the argument with Wang Xu last night, I felt guilty and agreed repeatedly. It wasn't just about the job; it was more about making up for the friendships I had neglected over the years for the sake of family.
I first called Wang Xu to tell him about this plan, thinking I could put on some makeup in the afternoon. However, it had been years since I last touched my cosmetics, and seeing all the expired products gave me a headache. So I decided to just grab my bag and head out.
I found a beauty salon that Mu Miaomiao had recommended before and took this opportunity to tidy myself up. The staff at the salon asked what services I needed, and I selected everything that could be done in an afternoon. Under their enthusiastic gazes, I started with a facial.
With my eyes closed, I felt their delicate fingers gently massaging my face and suddenly thought of a saying: women should treat themselves better; otherwise, other women might end up sleeping with your husband, living in your house, raising your children, and spending your money.
What used to sound like a joke now felt all too real. I had been frugal while being with Wang Xu, thinking of saving more money for our future and our future children.
In the end, part of what I saved ended up benefiting Deng Xiaomei—why should that be?
After spending an entire afternoon at the beauty salon, the staff asked me what kind of makeup I wanted. My skin was in its best condition right now, so it would be easy to apply makeup.
I didn't quite understand it myself, so I briefly explained the situation to her. I was going to meet a rich second-generation heir, and whether he would become my future Boss depended on this meeting.
Sister smiled knowingly at me, patted her chest, and assured me that everything would be fine; I could leave it to her.
I thought she had more experience than I did, so I decided to go along with her.
After another two hours, we finally finished. I looked at myself in the mirror repeatedly, and the confidence I had earlier was gone.
Seeing me in a daze, Sister quickly explained, "Sis, this makeup is just perfect for you. Think about it—if you go in with a bare face, the Big Boss might think you don't care. That's a big no-no. You have to let him know you're sincere."
That made sense to me. After paying, I had no more doubts and took a taxi to the hotel where Mu Miaomiao said to meet.
I had been here often before, so I just asked for the room number without having Mu Miaomiao come out to greet me. When I pushed open the slightly ajar door and saw Mu Miaomiao, I called out to her. She had been smiling and chatting with someone else, but when she heard me call her name, she turned around and her smile froze on her face.
The seat next to Mu Miaomiao was empty, while across from her sat Wang Nan and an unfamiliar man. The two of them exchanged meaningful glances that were not as obvious as Mu Miaomiao's reaction; they seemed to be holding back.
This startled me as well. What was going on?
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