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墨書 Inktalez
From the very beginning, I regarded Lu Ming as an unattainable existence. He should have worries, but he knows how to solve them, just like his usual indifference towards life. I am even more convinced that he is not someone who expresses emotions easily.
I can believe that Lu Ming would feel troubled over a business deal, but I cannot believe that his marriage would drive him to see a doctor.
"You..."
"Zhuang Jun, you are not my therapist. I have no obligation to tell you anything. Besides," his words were clearly meant to comfort me, yet they sounded more like business talk, laced with a hint of anger. "Your mental strength is not robust enough to handle more."
Upon reflection, it seemed he simply didn't want to add to my psychological burden, but his arrogant tone made it seem more about his own secrets.
I hesitated for a long time, mentally processing what Lu Ming had said. Any attempt to argue would be futile; he was right. I was emotionally unstable and could not bear the pain Lu Ming had once experienced. Although I was curious about his marriage and his ex-wife, remaining silent and not asking questions was the best choice for me at this moment.
However, Lu Ming's rationality was somewhat hurtful. His unrelenting exposure of my vulnerabilities made me uncomfortable. I pressed my lips together and stopped speaking, only to find Lu Ming handing me my phone.
"You have a message."
I instinctively widened my eyes in confusion as I took the phone from Lu Ming. When I pressed the button, the screen suddenly lit up, revealing unread WeChat messages.
The messages that appeared without needing a password contained content I never wanted Lu Ming to see.
"Hey beautiful, what are you doing? Can't sleep at night thinking about me? Are you thinking about me down there or do you want me to think about you? Just thinking about you gets me excited."
"Why aren't you replying? Are you fantasizing about my big thing? Me too, babe. I miss you so much and can't wait to see you. Remember our promise."
Song Qi's vulgar words were undoubtedly seen by Lu Ming. My cheeks burned with embarrassment as I glared at him; what had been exposed was something so humiliating that I couldn't even explain my actions.
Perhaps those messages were enough for Lu Ming to conclude that I was a promiscuous person.
"You are too much."
It must have been when my phone was on the coffee table that Lu Ming saw the message. He didn't know my password and couldn't unlock my phone, but that didn't help me convince myself of anything.
He must have seen the content sent by Song Qi. There was no doubt about it.
"Is this how you cope after being hurt?" Lu Ming's cold smile felt like a blade stabbing into my heart.
I wanted to tell him it wasn't true, but the truth was even harder to express. I had sought revenge by seducing the lover of the mistress, making him lose interest in her, and I had everything planned out, including the “violence” I intended to inflict on Deng Xiaomei through someone else.
These were things I could never bring myself to share with Lu Ming. After all, I wasn't exactly innocent. Perhaps when I became ruthless, I was even worse than what Deng Xiaomei had done. But so what?
If Deng Xiaomei hadn't destroyed my family, if Wang Xu hadn't abandoned me, if my mother-in-law hadn't hurt me, why should I engage in such dirty deeds?
"You don't need to worry about it; this is all my personal business. I only know that I've done what you hired me for, and you are not a competent Boss."
Strictly speaking, Lu Ming and I weren't even friends. We had only interacted a few times through Lu Shuang. Yet here he was, inexplicably intervening in my life and lecturing me after seeing right through me.
On what basis did he think he could do that? And why should I listen to him?
Regardless of whether his intentions were good or bad, I selfishly felt he was overstepping.
"Regardless, I cannot accept your way of doing things. I've decided to resign."
Not wanting to stand before Lu Ming as if stripped bare any longer, I chose to resign after weighing my options. Even if I truly reached a dead end as Lu Ming suggested, with my only friend abroad struggling for a living, I would find a way to survive.
I still had loving parents. If it came down to it, I could confront them about my situation. It would be like borrowing from them; once I found another job, I'd pay them back. Life would be much more stressful than it is now, but it would still be better than facing Lu Ming again.
At this moment, I felt a growing dislike for Lu Ming.
"Texting your man, is it Song Qi from Longteng Corporation?" Lu Ming suddenly mentioned Song Qi's name with familiarity.
I was taken aback. "You know him!?"
He responded indifferently with a "Hmm," his emotions unchanged before and after, unlike my turbulent feelings that were hard to control. "My company has collaborated with his."
I never expected the world to be so small; one of Deng Xiaomei's lovers actually had contact with Lu Ming!
"As far as I know, he's married with two kids," he continued, examining me with a scrutinizing gaze.
Ah, indeed, Lu Ming seemed to regard me as just another presence like Deng Xiaomei. He thought I was destroying someone else's family, even "kindly" reminding me.
"So what? Mr. Lu, have you become a moral model now, ready to uphold justice?" I laughed sarcastically, malicious words slipping out. "If that's the case, then why did you get divorced? Was your ex-wife not good enough for you? Not beautiful or young enough to attract you? So now you have time to lecture me here!"
It must be true; Lu Ming, as Miao Miao said, was a golden bachelor after the divorce. How many women were vying for him? Plus, seeing the young and beautiful woman in his car downstairs at the office, don't tell me that was his ex-wife.
There was only one possibility: Lu Ming was just like any other man who abandoned his wife after gaining wealth. It's rare that he had the heart to take care of Lu Shuang.
Hearing my various unkind speculations about him, Lu Ming seemed even calmer than before. Earlier, I could sense his anger towards me; now it had completely dissipated. He pressed his thin lips together and remained silent.
"Nothing to say? If there's nothing to say, then take me back or to a place where I can catch a taxi. I'll move out of the hotel tomorrow and will return the room card when I have time. If Shuangshuang can't find anyone to pick her up temporarily, I'll continue to do so."
I wanted to remind him that whoever picked up Lu Shuang should be fixed; otherwise, there would always be mistakes. But the words didn't come out. Lu Ming was Lu Shuang's father; I was merely her nanny. What right did I have to advise him?
After a long silence without him responding, I had said all I needed to say. My frustration rose again. Finally unable to bear the silence any longer, I was about to open the door and get out, no matter where we were.
But then Lu Ming locked the car door. He held my left wrist tightly. When I frowned and turned back to glare at him, his anger matched mine closely.
Finally showing some emotion, are we? No longer hiding it, right?
You look down on me, don't you?
"What exactly do you want?" He frowned slightly, gritting his teeth, clearly agitated.
"You don't need to worry about it." I couldn't shake off Lu Ming's hand and whispered sharply, "Let go, Mr. Lu. Aren't you being a bit too nosy? I'll say it again, this is all my own business!"
It seemed he couldn't understand my words. Despite my repeated insistence that it had nothing to do with him, he appeared even more intrigued.
"What are you after? What can Song Qi give you that makes you act like this towards him? Just because your family was destroyed by someone else, do you want to take revenge on others?"
I coldly chuckled, "Yes, I am that kind of person. Mr. Lu, are you just now realizing this? You really have no insight. But Mr. Lu, I've said many times that this is my own matter. Since Song Qi is just a partner in your company, why should I make Mr. Lu so angry by ruining his family?"
"Because of you."
"What?"
I looked at Lu Ming in surprise; he didn't seem to be joking.
"Mr. Lu, you're really joking. I'm just a small employee of yours. If you think my actions reflect poorly on you, I’ve already said I would resign. From this moment on, I have no connection with Mr. Lu." I emphasized each word for Lu Ming's benefit, wanting him to acknowledge the topic I had brought up repeatedly.
Having been labeled with so many dirty tags, Lu Ming must want to avoid me at all costs.
It's not that I don't want to explain or that I want to be seen as filthy; it's just that what good would my explanation do? My motives are even more sordid than what Lu Ming knows now.
Having stepped onto this path, there's no turning back. What can I hope for now that's clean? Wang Xu's infidelity dragged me into the abyss alongside him; I am shattered and have no way out.
"You can have whatever you want from me."
"What do you mean..."
"Just set a condition."
I laughed heartily; if there were a mirror, I would surely see myself looking like a madman.
"Mr. Lu, are you saying you want to support me, just like the woman waiting for you in the car downstairs at your company?!"
Lu Ming's words hit harder than the pain in my wrist. He had slapped me, yet it felt as if nothing had happened, and I could only endure helplessly.
"Yes, that's right."
He really hadn't considered leaving me any dignity. He admitted to supporting that woman and even wanted to do the same to me. Whether it was sympathy or humiliation, I was well aware of my situation.
Fine, I was already on a path of self-destruction; I wasn't afraid of how brutal it would be.
"Mr. Lu, you're quite amusing. You're a businessman and know that transactions are based on mutual consent. I am clearly telling you now, Mr. Lu, that I refuse."
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