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墨書 Inktalez
When all these nightmares come to an end and the dust has settled.
I opened my eyes, which felt a bit sore from being tightly shut, and glanced at the man lying on me, seemingly asleep with his eyes closed. I knew he wasn't truly asleep. I tried to move my limbs, but my entire body ached, and the effects of the Softening Powder still rendered me immobile.
I turned my neck and looked at the chaos around me, feeling an endless desolation in my heart. What filled the hall was not just despair, but hopelessness...
I closed my eyes for a moment, then calmly spoke, "Is it over? If it's done, please release me from the Softening Powder so I can leave."
Hearing my unperturbed words, he suddenly lifted his head, his blood-red eyes fixed on me as if trying to read something in my gaze. But he saw nothing—only emptiness reflected in my hollow eyes.
He grasped my chin tightly and shouted angrily, "You are a woman; don’t you care about anything?"
"It's just a body. Sooner or later it will belong to some man; I don't care," I replied nonchalantly, pausing before cruelly adding, "I just feel dirty."
"You—" He tightened his grip around my neck, his strength increasing to the point where it felt like he might kill me. My cheeks flushed red as breathing became difficult, yet I stubbornly held his gaze. I stared at him without blinking, saying nothing.
He looked at me for a long time before finally releasing me and bitterly asked, "Aren't you going to plead with me?"
I coughed violently, my face turning crimson, but still forced myself to respond coldly despite the discomfort in my throat. "Does pleading even matter?" If it had been useful, I would have begged him before; why didn't he let me go then? Under extreme reluctance, he had taken advantage of me.
Seeing my coldness that was almost unbearable for him, he leaned back away from my body and murmured in disbelief, "You don't mind; you really don't mind."
I shot him a sidelong glance. "Why should I mind? It's just a body. If you want it, take it; it's yours. Now that you've gotten what you wanted, you should let me go to avoid staining this Dragon Bed." Even though my heart felt like it was breaking into pieces, I wouldn't show him my weakness—not now. Absolutely not.
"You shameless woman—" he gritted his teeth.
"Your Majesty, I am not the kind of woman who is devoted to one man for life, nor will I be the kind of woman who cries out in despair just because I have lost my virginity. Do you think I would be like other women, overjoyed by your favor, or throwing tantrums and threatening to hang myself? I'm sorry to disappoint you. All I want now is to go back and wash away this filth."
He swung his hand towards me. "How dare you say that I am filthy?!"
I licked the blood from the corner of my mouth and turned my head, still expressionless. "Isn't it enough? Do you need me to take a few more slaps to vent your anger? If that's not enough, Your Majesty, please feel free to strike me again. Once you've had your fill of venting, I can go back." At that moment, I had completely forgotten about the emperor, about status and class distinctions; all those thoughts were cast aside. What mattered now was my dignity as a modern woman and my refusal to submit.
"You—" He closed his eyes, suppressing the rage that filled them. When he opened them again, he was calm and composed, still the noble emperor.
He picked up a small red vial from beside the bed and held it to my nose for me to smell. A foul odor wafted up, reminiscent of rotten eggs. However, after lying quietly for a while, my strength began to return. Ignoring his gaze and expression, I struggled to sit up, but the pain in my lower body caused me to collapse after only a few steps. Still, I stubbornly stood up again, brushing away his hand as he tried to help me. I grabbed a piece of cloth and wrapped it around my body. Step by step, even though it was difficult, I resolutely moved away from this place, away from his sight, away from him...
"You—" he called softly from behind, but I did not turn back; I stubbornly disappeared into the gentle moonlight. Vanishing into this complete nightmare. I prayed that when I woke up tomorrow, everything would return to how it was before; that would prove that all of tonight was a lie—a complete fabrication!
Though deep down, I knew this was merely wishful thinking.
I still could not forget; even in my dreams, I could not erase what he had said when I left the Imperial Hall: "What I desire cannot be stopped by anyone. Xie Weiying, you are mine."
You are mine, you are mine... This voice buzzed incessantly in my ears as I pressed my hands over them in agony. Stop thinking about it! Stop thinking about it!
Stumbling through the dark night back to Jiu Nian Xuan, I needed a place—a place belonging to An Jin—to hide away and slowly heal this wound that would never scar over. To gradually conceal it beneath my skin and clothing so that no one could see it. All I needed was for me alone to lick at the bloodstains that would not stop.
Struggling to push open the door, I expected darkness to greet me; instead, there was a lamp lit inside. The soft light instantly warmed my frozen heart bit by bit. Standing at the doorway, I saw Yun Ying pacing anxiously in the hall. As she finally noticed me standing outside, her face lit up with joy before she turned around and saw my disheveled appearance draped in nothing but a piece of cloth; her eyes immediately filled with tears. We locked eyes for a moment as a faint smile crept onto my lips.
She looked at me while tears streamed down her face without stopping. She murmured repeatedly, "I knew it would be like this; I knew... Miss, I'm sorry! It's all Yun Ying's fault for being useless and not being able to protect you; I've let you suffer..."
Xiao Quanzi rushed in from behind and stared at me in shock, helplessly saying, "My lady—"
I stumbled forward, wanting to go help Yun Ying wipe away her tears. My heart ached for her, but as soon as I took a step, a wave of dizziness hit me, and everything went black—I knew nothing more.
When I woke up, the dawn was breaking in the east. Before I even opened my eyes, I heard the sound of soft sobs from Ear. Struggling to open my eyes, the first thing I saw was Yun Ying's tear-streaked face and her red eyes. She was using a towel to wipe my body.
I touched my still heavy forehead and asked softly, "What happened to me?"
Yun Ying looked at me with blurry eyes and choked out, "Miss fainted. You had a fever all night. It was only after Lord Qing arrived, got the medicine, and brewed it for you that you finally woke up."
"Oh," I murmured, "no wonder I felt dizzy and weak all day yesterday."
Yun Ying suddenly hugged me tightly and cried, "Miss, it's okay. Everything will be fine. Lord Qing said that as long as you take the medicine according to the prescription for a few days, you'll be alright."
I smiled weakly in her embrace. "Silly girl, who do you think I am? Of course I'll be fine. I've got everything under control. Don't worry. Go help me prepare some hot water; I want to bathe."
"Okay." Yun Ying released me, nodded, and then left with tears in her eyes to fetch the water. Just then, she brushed past Chen Ningyuan as he entered.
Seeing me, Chen Ningyuan looked worried and asked, "Young Master, are you alright?"
I nodded. "I'm fine. Sorry for troubling you again last night."
"That's what I'm here for," he replied hesitantly. He seemed to want to say more but ended with a simple, "You should rest," before leaving. I could see his hesitation and knew what he wanted to say. He must have seen the marks on my chest while treating me last night. Without needing words, I could guess what had happened.
"Miss, be careful." Since my body felt weak and exhausted, I had to rely on Yun Ying to help me into the bathing tub.
Clinging to her arm, I stepped into the tub slowly. Instantly, a wave of relief washed over me that made me sigh involuntarily; however, the tearing pain in my lower body reminded me vividly of everything that had happened last night.
Yun Ying gently rubbed my back, concern etched on her face. I said lightly, "Yun Ying, you haven't returned all night. Won't Consort Wang suspect anything?"
"Don't worry, I've taken care of everything," Yun Ying replied. "Yesterday, when I saw the emperor's displeased expression, my eyelids kept twitching. I had a bad feeling, so after making arrangements over there, I hurried here to wait for you. And sure enough—" At this point, Yun Ying's voice broke into sobs again. "The most important thing now is for you to take care of your health and not overexert yourself."
I fell silent, looking at the numerous blue marks scattered across my body, some already turning purple and others showing bruises. What kind of anger drove him to act recklessly last night? I shook my head, unwilling to think further. Closing my eyes, I submerged myself in the water, letting everything fade into silence.
Just after finishing my bath, Yun Ying was helping me put on a casual robe when Xiao Quanzi suddenly rushed in, exclaiming, "My lady, Eunuch Gao Lu has arrived and says he has an imperial decree to deliver."
Yun Ying supported me as I knelt respectfully on the ground.
Eunuch Gao Lu spoke gravely above me, "Please receive the decree from Xie Jieyu."
"Firefly receives the decree. Long live the emperor!"
"By the grace of Heaven, the emperor proclaims: Fourth Miss Xie, during her time as Jieyu, has failed to uphold the duties of a consort and has acted inappropriately, committing acts that are detrimental to propriety. She should be executed as a warning to others. However, considering her diligent service to the emperor during her time here and weighing her merits against her faults, from today onward, she shall be stripped of her Jieyu title and transferred to Frostfall Palace. Thus it is decreed. Xie Weiying, do not delay in receiving the decree and expressing your gratitude."
I complied, saying, "This servant receives the decree and thanks Your Majesty for your grace. Long live the emperor!" A cold smile tugged at my lips. What I received for one night’s ordeal was merely a banishment to Cold Palace? For me, that was quite a reward indeed.
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