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墨書 Inktalez
Gu Ze encountered a very simple situation.
First, he saw the thick mist, and there was not a single person around. He began to call out the names of everyone one by one, and after receiving no response, he started shouting Xu Nuan's name.
He had once seen Xu Nuan having a nightmare, murmuring repeatedly, "Don't leave me, I don't want to be alone." It was the first time he had seen Xu Nuan so fragile and desperate, and while he felt heartache, he also felt anger.
He felt heartache for this Xu Nuan and anger towards Qin Yaojie.
He had seen Xu Nuan in countless forms: happy, lively, smiling, blissful, sad, lost, as well as indifferent, calm, and strong. No matter what form she took, she was still Xu Nuan. However, he never wanted to see the desperate side of Xu Nuan again.
Sometimes he thought all of this was retribution for the old master.
He had grown accustomed to Smooth Sailing; from studying to working, from playing to serious matters, he had never failed. He was the young master of the family and always carried himself with elegance as a Gentleman when he went out. At school, he was a good student—polite junior and exemplary senior—diligent Staff in his department and an undisputed leader. In the company, with little experience, he effortlessly became a Core Staff member due to both his abilities and the influence behind him.
Yet the only area where he had faced difficulties was in love.
Back in school, he only knew the joys before him and didn’t understand these matters. In middle school, he was naive and foolish; during high school, family training left him no time to care about so-called innocent crushes.
It wasn't until university that he welcomed his first love: the lively and adorable Xu Nuan who loved life.
It also turned out to be an unrequited crush that ended without any resolution.
It seemed quite laughable; he had always succeeded in everything he did but stumbled when it came to love. During university nights in the boys' dormitory, conversations revolved around either games or girls.
His brothers would boast about their romantic histories—some had their first loves, others recounted tales of girls pursuing them or bragged about their achievements. Each of them entered university already knowing what love was.
Only he had an epiphany, albeit through the clumsiest and most roundabout method.
Graduating from university was the most unforgettable moment of his life; it marked the end of his first love.
In the three years that followed, he dated three or four girlfriends.
The relationships varied in length, from six months to just a month.
At first, they all shared common interests and hobbies, occasionally going out for tea and chatting. Their conversations ranged from highbrow to lowbrow, and it naturally led to them becoming a couple.
Whenever he started dating someone, his friends would comment on how well-matched they were, a perfect pairing of talent and beauty, or the best combination of a gentleman and a lady.
However, the terms "gentleman" and "lady" were merely superficial representations. The dynamics between men and women changed drastically before and after they became a couple. As they grew closer and learned more about each other, they discovered that their hearts did not align as seamlessly as their interests did.
Thus, breakups followed suit.
Eventually, he stopped pursuing romantic relationships altogether. Even when he encountered women with whom he shared interests and could converse easily, those interactions remained superficial.
If there was no spiritual connection, why force mutual discomfort?
He often thought of Xu Nuan, wondering what might have happened if he had confessed his feelings. Or if Xu Nuan had been single when he confessed and they ended up together—what would their outcome have been?
Would it have turned out like his previous relationships, where after getting to know each other better, he realized, ah, she is not the person I want?
Then they broke up, becoming familiar strangers.
Could it be?
Gu Ze didn’t know, and he felt lost. Moreover, what he had envisioned was impossible; there weren’t that many "what ifs" in this world.
He suddenly realized that he no longer understood love.
He became despondent and indifferent, burdened by a family behind him. He lived in a daze, merely getting by—this was the best way to describe his state at that time.
Then one day, something happened.
He had a buddy from the Upper Class Circle, an heir to a certain conglomerate, who bore the expectations of his entire family. This buddy liked men.
For that family, it was nothing short of a disgrace. Because of this, the buddy faced numerous difficulties, and his lover was repeatedly oppressed.
The path to his inheritance became incredibly arduous, and his lover fell gravely ill due to the immense pressure.
The buddy began to resist, arguing with logic. When he realized that this approach was futile, he silently resolved to become strong. The road to strength was fraught with challenges, but in the end, the buddy inherited the family business and stayed with his lover.
However, what should have been easily attainable became immensely difficult simply because his buddy fell for a man—someone he shouldn’t have liked.
Gu Ze remembered asking his buddy about it; he wasn’t born liking men, nor did he come to like them due to some experience. It just so happened that the person he liked was a man.
"Is it worth it?"
Gu Ze asked at that time.
"It is worth it."
His Buddy smiled happily.
"Why do you like him? Why do you want to grow old with him?"
Gu Ze admitted that he felt a bit jealous at that moment. Ah, his Buddy had found someone he wanted to spend his life with, while he was still lost.
Gu Ze remembered his Buddy's answer.
"Well, what can you do? People are just faces, eyes, noses, and mouths. When you peel away the skin, the differences aren't that significant. It's the same with gender; sometimes the distinction is purely physiological. Maybe it's just that sleeping together feels different. But the soul residing in different bodies is what makes each person unique. What I like is his soul; I was drawn to it. Who cares if he's male or female, fat or thin, beautiful or ugly?"
After hearing those words, Gu Ze had a moment of clarity, and Xu Nuan's image popped into his mind.
Is that love? He seemed to understand a little bit.
A lot had happened in the game, and Gu Ze was still uncertain about his feelings for Xu Nuan. Was he reminiscing about that unfulfilled romance, or had he fallen for her once again?
In times of uncertainty, he wanted to get closer, to understand her better, and then found himself drawn in, ultimately realizing he had fallen again.
He no longer cared whether this was love; all he knew was that he was drawn to the soul within the shell named Xu Nuan. He wanted to get closer to that soul, and before he realized it, he had fallen deeply, leaving no room in his heart for anyone else.
Gu Ze considered himself a pathetic person, especially when facing Xu Nuan.
Knowing that the woman had someone else in her heart, he still shamelessly approached her, convinced that he had a chance and needed to seize it. Yet every time he saw Xu Nuan saddened by that other person, anger would rise within him, darkening his thoughts, and he would lash out with hurtful words. But just as he was about to inflict pain, he would soften at the sight of Xu Nuan's eyes and relent.
What else could this be but pathetic?
He liked to save her when she was in danger because it was the only opportunity he had to touch Xu Nuan. Each time he held her tightly during those perilous moments, he thought that perhaps they should just die together.
If they couldn't be together, then they might as well perish together.
Every time he embraced Xu Nuan, he wished to merge her into his very being, never to be apart. If that were possible, their souls would be intertwined forever—how wonderful would that be?
So he remained pathetic; in front of Xu Nuan, he couldn't be forceful or coercive.
Seeing Xu Nuan in pain made him suffer too, and when he suffered, he wanted to hurt her.
In the end, all he could do was watch Xu Nuan, powerless to act.
This is what it means to be pathetic; a man who is pathetic will be looked down upon.
But hey, a man can be pathetic for the woman he loves—there's nothing wrong with that; he's willing.
Thinking of Xu Nuan, Gu Ze couldn't help but laugh out loud. As his laughter faded, the mist around him dissipated, revealing a beast that appeared to be a genetic combination of various animals.
Gu Ze locked eyes with the beast, and it lunged at him.
He nimbly sidestepped, reaching for the short knife at his waist, only to realize it was missing. As the beast charged again, Gu Ze decided to confront it head-on. Just before they collided, he twisted his body and grabbed hold of the beast's sharp horns.
With a firm grip on the beast's horns, Gu Ze found himself in a battle of strength. He pushed against the beast's force with all his might.
Gu Ze relied on skill while the beast used brute strength. When the brute force became overwhelming, Gu Ze had to think of other ways to counter it. While bracing against the beast's power, he scanned his surroundings and suddenly spotted a deep puddle not far away. An idea sparked in his mind.
Holding tightly to the beast's horns, Gu Ze maneuvered toward the puddle. Using his agility, he managed to hold off the brute force for a moment. Before long, they reached the edge of the puddle. Gathering all his strength in his arms, Gu Ze suddenly yanked the beast toward the water.
As he had anticipated, the beast fell into the puddle. Just as he sighed in relief, however, the creature extended a human arm and grabbed hold of his pant leg. Gu Ze lost his balance and tumbled into the puddle himself.
"Cough cough."
Spitting out some dirty water, Gu Ze thought about escaping quickly when he heard a familiar voice.
"Ze?"
The only person in the game who would call him that was his good buddy Xu Hang, although he had hoped countless times that Xu Nuan would address him similarly.
Wiping the water from his face, Gu Ze realized that what he had thought was a beast was actually Xu Hang.
"You?"
Gu Ze was still in disbelief, and Xu Hang wore a look of astonishment as well.
"What happened to the beast that was just confronting me?"
In an instant, Gu Ze understood. Both he and Xu Hang had mistaken each other for the beast and attacked. It seemed that the mist was indeed problematic.
With this realization, Gu Ze and Xu Hang noticed that they were standing on the grassland, with no sign of anyone else around. However, they could easily imagine that others must have experienced similar illusions, possibly mistaking their companions for beasts and attacking them.
"Let's find them before anything goes wrong."
Gu Ze and Xu Hang quickly scrambled out of the puddle, only to see a swarm of glowing butterflies fluttering away from them.
"The butterflies are suspicious, and so is the mist," Xu Hang remarked calmly.
Gu Ze nodded. "But now we know how to wake them up."
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