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墨書 Inktalez
"Should I trust you? You're just another person who has captured my heart, so where does that leave me in your eyes?"
Xu Nuan felt a chill run through her body, and the pain in her left wrist couldn't pull her out of this state. As she sat up, the weight of his words threatened to push her back down. She quickly braced herself against the ground to avoid falling again. In her shock, she didn't notice Gu Ze stepping forward only to retreat again.
"Captured your heart?"
Xu Nuan's teeth chattered as immense anger reddened her eyes. The pain from the corners of her widened gaze was momentarily forgotten.
"What do you take me for? I don't know this Su Zihang, and I have no idea what's going on."
These past few days had been filled with confusion and pain for her. In her moments of uncertainty, she had hoped Gu Ze would come over to help her analyze things and ease her suffering, but she was disappointed. Now, it was not just disappointment; an indescribable rage had soured her tone.
"Don't know?" Gu Ze chuckled softly, his voice grating on her nerves. "You don't know about Su Zihang, but what about that Shen Shen you seem so familiar with? Is he also a mystery to you?"
"What does Shen Shen have to do with this?"
Xu Nuan's memories of Shen Shen were limited to a few Survival Games ago at the Supply Station, where he treated Fan Beibei. Although that Shen Shen felt familiar, she had never been able to recall where she had seen him outside of the game.
At this moment, she felt that Gu Ze standing before her was utterly unfamiliar—someone entirely different from the person she liked and wanted to step forward with.
"Oh," Gu Ze maintained his previous expression and tone. "So he's just another man you've cast aside. How pitiful."
"Gu Ze!"
Xu Nuan's anger flared at Gu Ze's attitude. She stumbled to her feet, glaring at him fiercely.
"Don't you dare insult me like that!"
At this moment, she was overwhelmed by thoughts she had never considered before. The man who had once vowed to stand by her, to wait for her—Gu Ze—was now mocking her with such derogatory words.
She trembled with anger, her mind spinning in a haze that intensified her pain. Yet, despite her visible distress, Gu Ze approached her with a cold, mocking smile on his lips, looking down at her with deliberate slowness.
"Am I wrong?"
She struggled to discern the emotions hidden in Gu Ze's eyes. Not long ago, she had seen warmth and affection there—feelings she had longed for.
"Qin Yaojie has barely been dead for a while, and you already got involved with me. I merely wanted to keep you from obsessing over Ning Han, and then you went off with that Shen Shen. Now here you are calling out the name of a man you've never even met."
Gu Ze leaned down slightly, gripping Xu Nuan's chin to force her to look up at him. She could see the anger and mockery etched on his face, and those eyes that should have sparkled with gentle affection were now filled with danger.
"Did I insult you? It’s you who never took my feelings to heart."
The pain radiating from her chin and the immense fury swelling in her chest compelled Xu Nuan to speak. She could only listen as the man she loved hurled words at her like an earthquake shattering everything she believed.
"I was truly foolish. You only killed someone out of pain to please me and alleviate your own suffering, while I naively thought you had fallen in love with me. If you weren't inherently like this, how could you have done such things with that Shen Shen in the lounge? Ha."
"Slap!"
Fueled by overwhelming rage, Xu Nuan struck Gu Ze across the face. But as she prepared to hit him again, he seized her wrist. As his face drew closer, she heard his dangerously low voice.
"You know how much this slap is worth? Just once."
Xu Nuan, shocked and unable to accept what Gu Ze had just revealed, found her breath stolen away. This time, it wasn't a gentle caress; it was a domineering force that left her feeling humiliated, something she could not endure.
In the end, her strength was no match for Gu Ze. As her mind began to blank and the oxygen in her chest dwindled, she could only weakly cling to Gu Ze's shoulder to prevent herself from collapsing. It was a reflexive action when one couldn't think, yet it allowed Gu Ze to momentarily release her while mocking her in her ear.
"Sure enough, this is your true nature; you’re so quick to take the initiative."
As Xu Nuan finally gasped for air, she prepared to slap Gu Ze again while she still had some strength left. However, Gu Ze pushed her to the ground. The immense pain shooting through her back brought tears to her eyes. This scene felt eerily familiar, and the memories of a nightmare that nearly haunted her returned with a vengeance.
Feeling the weight on top of her, Xu Nuan suddenly bent her knees and attempted to strike at Gu Ze as he sidestepped. But Gu Ze swiftly pinned her leg down and forced her hand behind her back, invading her space once more.
More painful than the physical agony was the constant humiliation in Gu Ze's words. They were foreign yet infuriating; she was indeed the one who had been abandoned, but she never imagined it would happen so quickly.
She was ultimately a lost soul destined for hell.
As a sharp pain shot through her neck, she heard Gu Ze's mocking voice again.
"That's how you treated Shen Shen back then; I’ve never forgotten that expression."
Despite the anger coursing through her body, Xu Nuan managed to extract some useful information from Gu Ze's words. It seemed likely that something had happened between her and Shen Shen in the lounge that Gu Ze witnessed and misinterpreted. However, she had no memory of that moment, and she believed that Gu Ze was not easily deceived unless what he saw was indeed real.
What exactly had she done to lead to such a situation?
No, what exactly did Shen Shen do? The familiar feeling, the comfortable aura, claiming to be a doctor.
Xu Nuan suddenly felt she had grasped an important clue, but before she could think it through, a cold breeze rushed in through her torn collar, startling her back to reality.
“Bastard!”
Xu Nuan began to struggle again, filled with anger and shame. Frustrated by her inability to remember that part of her past, she finally found enough strength to attack Gu Ze. She forcefully drove her knee into his abdomen, causing him to double over, clutching his stomach as he fell to the side.
Sitting up, Xu Nuan hurriedly covered herself and wiped the blood from the corner of her mouth before glaring at Gu Ze in fury.
“I’ll say it once more: I didn’t do what you think I did. Believe it or not!”
A new wave of coldness swept over her, chilling her to the bone. She realized that in order to understand this matter, she had to ask Gu Ze. But looking at him now, his actions clearly showed he didn’t believe her. If he didn’t trust her, then she might as well face this alone. After all, she was destined to become a wandering soul; her fate was already sealed. She could still move forward on her own, even if it meant being battered and bruised.
The more she thought about it, the angrier Xu Nuan became. As tears threatened to spill from her eyes, she turned away sharply and wiped them away before turning back to Gu Ze.
Gu Ze remained in a solitary position, one hand pressed against his abdomen while the other rested on the grass, staring blankly ahead.
It was a very lonely posture.
Xu Nuan felt her eyes welling up again and had to turn away to wipe her tears before stubbornly looking at Gu Ze once more.
“You didn’t do what I thought you did?”
Looking at the blue-clad Gu Ze, he finally spoke, his tone filled with a desolate chill.
"Then tell me, Nuan, is your obsession with Ning Han and Zhang Xiao really just to avenge Qin Yaojie?"
Xu Nuan widened her eyes as she stared at the unmoving Gu Ze. Bitterness and sorrow gradually crept to her lips. It turned out that Gu Ze truly did not understand her actions. She had thought that even if this person didn’t comprehend her, it was a mere illusion—a one-sided wish of hers.
Xu Nuan did not respond; she felt there was no need to express emotions that had no outlet.
However, before she could answer, Gu Ze suddenly turned over, gripping her shoulders tightly with both hands. Even when he saw Xu Nuan's discomfort as she frowned, he did not loosen his hold.
"Answer me!"
His voice was dangerous, his presence oppressive, and his eyes concealed emotions that were hard to read.
It was simply disbelief.
"Heh."
Xu Nuan chuckled lightly, meeting Gu Ze's gaze directly, speaking each word deliberately.
"Yes, I am indeed doing this for Qin Yaojie."
"As you said, I am such a fickle woman."
"Congratulations, you no longer have to like someone like me."
Xu Nuan broke free from Gu Ze's grasp, refusing to look at his changing expression as she strode up the hillside. As she walked, the path ahead became obscured by a layer of mist. She turned and walked in another direction, with no intention of returning to the base camp.
When she finally reached a deserted area, Xu Nuan took a moment to wipe her eyes and then fixed her gaze on a purple flower in front of her. It resembled her favorite bellflower.
After all, she and Gu Ze could only be considered a fleeting romance. They had never expressed their feelings for each other or confirmed their relationship, so there was no need for either of them to bear any responsibility. It was only natural that misunderstandings could lead them to part ways.
Yet, she felt wronged. She knew nothing, while Gu Ze had not bothered to investigate anything and had spoken such hurtful words to her, doubting her feelings.
She had never intended for things to turn out this way, but her mouth betrayed her, and her mind lost all rationality; her heart felt like it was about to leap out of her chest.
"Ha."
Xu Nuan let out a heavy sigh. The anxiety she had felt did not dissipate; she lost interest in everything and confidence in completing her plans.
In a fit of stubbornness, not wanting to face the heartache caused by Gu Ze, Xu Nuan simply sat down, gazing up at the drifting clouds against the blue sky. However, she forgot that lately, whenever she sat down and allowed her mind to rest, she would quickly fall asleep and dream of things she did not wish to see, calling out names of people she did not know.
As Xu Nuan lay on the grass asleep, she remained unaware that someone had appeared just a few steps away from her.
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