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墨書 Inktalez
"Why aren't you asleep yet? You usually fall asleep by now."
I didn't get up or respond. He came closer and quietly sat down at the edge of the bed. The room was dimly lit by a single thin candle, casting a vague shadow of his figure. In fact, I hadn't seen him for a long time, not since my injury.
"Did you go out today?" he asked.
"Yes."
"What did you do?"
"It's a secret."
Night Phantom awkwardly pursed his lips.
"What's wrong? Is it not allowed to have secrets? Why do you look upset?" I furrowed my brow.
He shook his head and sighed softly.
"I'm not angry with you; I'm only angry with one person." As he looked at me, seemingly indifferent, his gaze began to drift, and his words turned into murmurs. "Some people decide to silently protect others, but they can never manage to do so. Even when better opportunities arise, they just can't help but interfere, ruining someone else's good fortune. Can someone like that be forgiven?"
"Forgiven..." I couldn't understand what he meant at all. My thoughts were completely elsewhere, so I just responded vaguely and fell back into my own contemplation.
My day with Bai Qianfan had suddenly overturned my worldview, throwing me into endless confusion and self-doubt.
I had always been so confident. I spent eight years preparing for my journey to the Tang Dynasty, learning various skills. I once smiled with certainty as I looked down upon the world I was about to live in and conquer, viewing it as a beautiful flower, while I was the one holding the Scalpel, fully confident in my ability to dissect it perfectly.
But I was completely wrong; this world was not a flower that could be clearly appreciated for its petals and stamen. The Tang Dynasty was a massive onion; you never knew how thick it was, how spicy it could be, or what kinds of buds and cores were hidden within its juicy layers. I wasn't a conqueror at all; I was just a tiny being wanting to survive here. Everything here was different from what I had imagined, and everyone was far more complex than I had thought.
Let me think from the beginning. What am I here for?
Well, I'm here to find Nie Qiuyuan. I'm infatuated with him; I want to be with him, to experience a wonderful romance, and to spend my life together with him.
But is this "Nie Qiuyuan" really the same "Nie Qiuyuan"?
The portrait I saw, could it not belong to "Luo Dachun"? Now "Luo Dachun" is working in Yichuan County under the identity of "Nie Qiuyuan," so the biographical information I have read must also pertain to "Luo Dachun," right?
Then who is "Luo Dachun"? What kind of place is Snowfall Villa? Who is "Nie Qiuyuan"? Where did he come from? What did the Mirror Gate take from him? What has he been searching for all along?
And what am I doing right now?
In an instant, countless figures flashed through my mind like a revolving lantern: the young emperor Li Shimin, Fang Xuanling, Bai Qianfan, Su Liche, Ren Pingsheng from the Mirror Gate, Ruo Chanjuan, Hongxi, and those around me—Melan, Lin Jiu, Wang Jinzhi. Each one of them felt so vividly alive.
This is a real world, and I need to continue living here. Not as a god, but as a speck of dust.
A surge of passion swelled within my heart, overflowing with an inexplicable desire. This power had nothing to do with love; it was simply the sudden realization that I might be part of a tide, witnessing the emergence of an extraordinary era—one even more thrilling than I had imagined.
Perhaps my foolish intrusion into the Tang Dynasty carries a destined mission.
If I keep striving to live in this world, surely there will come a time when I harvest the love that is fated for me?
My love is probably like a huge onion; I need to patiently peel it layer by layer. Letting go of past attachments and facing my own heart, as each mystery gradually sheds its outer skin, I will surely be able to see his face clearly. He stands there quietly smiling at me—the one who truly entered my heart, my destined lover.
"What are you thinking about?"
I was startled and met the gaze of Night Phantom, who was quietly smiling at me.
I shook my head, suddenly feeling that his presence was like a pair of overly comfortable shoes, causing me to often forget he was there. When did he stop speaking to me in rude and mocking tones?
"Zhenzhen..."
"Mm?"
"If only you could be completely useless."
"What do you mean? Are the things I can do worthless?"
"I mean, if only you didn't have to know anything at all. But that's not the case right now; the enemy is too dangerous, and you still need the ability to protect yourself."
"What's wrong with that? I'm clearly working hard! Don't worry, I'll get stronger and stronger!"
"But that way, it makes the man who wants to protect you feel useless!"
The thought of the man who wants to protect me—could it be him? His words somehow warmed my heart, just a little bit, making me wish he wouldn't leave.
I was startled. What am I doing?
The next day, I understood what Night Phantom meant when Nie Qiuyuan came to see me.
He had chosen a time when no one else was around, asked about my condition, and then steered the conversation toward the main topic.
"Liuying, in a moment I'll teach you some simple breathing techniques. You can practice them while lying down; it will also help with your injuries. Once you're healed, I'll start teaching you internal skills and combat techniques. From now on, I'll be your teacher."
His tone was gentle but left no room for negotiation. I wondered if I had some masochistic tendencies; in any case, at that moment, he seemed particularly admirable. He wanted me to learn martial arts to protect myself because he hoped I could survive well by his side.
If he didn't want me to stay with him, he wouldn't bother teaching me martial arts!
Yet there were two questions lingering in my mind.
Nie Qiuyuan—has he really seen through my true nature? Has he noticed that I've suddenly acquired many reconnaissance techniques in my mind?
Bai Qianfan's words made sense; even someone like Lord Bai, whom I had only met a few times, could intuitively see through me. Nie Qiuyuan's perceptiveness couldn't possibly be any less. Moreover, we were siblings living under the same roof, spending every day together.
So, why has Nie Qiuyuan never revealed anything and always acted as if he were completely unaware?
Should I continue to play along? Or should I...
There's another question: in this era, is there even a word for "teacher"? Nie Qiuyuan said, "From now on, I will be your teacher." How could he understand such a term?
I remember that at that time, Night Phantom and Zhang Yang were my world; they were my teachers. Did he really tell Nie Qiuyuan about Zhang Yang?!
"Are you listening?" Nie Qiuyuan asked with a frown. "The incantation is not easy to understand."
I raised my head and looked at him for half a minute, suddenly feeling a desire to throw caution to the wind.
I steeled myself and stared directly into his eyes, saying something provocative.
"What if I don't want to learn?!"
I suppose that was the answer. There was no look of surprise on Nie Qiuyuan's face; instead, the corners of his mouth lifted slightly as he smiled.
"No," he said with a smile, his tone firm and unwavering.
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