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Feng Guyu licked her lips and continued, "After the death of 'Feng Guyu' was confirmed, a heavy gloom enveloped our home, permeating the atmosphere with a sense of desolation. Yet, upon closer examination, this atmosphere also carried a hint of strangeness.
Looking back now, the state you and Mother exhibited at that time was merely one of heaviness, not pure sorrow.
There was even a moment when my bedridden mother grasped my hand and weakly said to me, 'Xunyu, it's fortunate that the one who died is Guyue and not you.
Do you know? Among my three children, you are the one I love the most.
Yin Xuan has already left me; if you were to leave as well, I wouldn't be able to bear such a blow. I would surely lose the will to live.'"
At this point, a trace of loneliness flickered in Feng Guyu's eyes. She paused before continuing, "Mother's words struck me like a heavy hammer on my heart, leaving me deeply affected.
Although I have always lived in my own world, disdainful of integrating into others' lives and unwilling for anyone to pry into my inner thoughts—indeed, no one could understand me—hearing Mother express that my death would not bring her sorrow hit me hard.
In that moment, I felt as if I should not exist in this world; living became a sort of wrongdoing."
Feng Guyu tilted her head slightly, as if lost in memories. After a moment, she spoke again: "At that time, a thought surged strongly in my mind: it should have been Feng Guyu who died because no one would care about her life or death; it should have been Feng Xunyu who lived on because her absence would truly break everyone's hearts.
But reality was precisely the opposite—Feng Xunyu died while I, Feng Guyu, lived.
In the midst of this extreme inner conflict and struggle, my mental defenses collapsed, and I developed a split personality—a new persona emerged: the personality of Feng Xunyu."
She exhaled softly and continued slowly, "In the days that followed, I felt as if I were being driven by an invisible force. Uncontrollably, I donned Feng Xunyu's brightly colored clothes and mimicked her every move. Gradually, I slipped into the role of Feng Xunyu until even my thoughts transformed into hers."
The new personality gradually consumed the original one, until I completely became Feng Xunyu, without even realizing it.
Feng Guyu's gaze appeared somewhat vacant as she continued, "That's right. When Feng Guyu was entirely replaced by Feng Xunyu, all memories related to Feng Guyu vanished as well. Therefore, I had no idea that the father I remembered as somewhat kind was actually the murderer of Feng Yinxuan and 'Feng Guyu.'
Not only did that memory disappear, but even my past before the age of fifteen became hazy. Although I transformed into Feng Xunyu, I ultimately couldn't replicate all of her memories, retaining only fragments of experiences we shared."
She lifted her gaze to Sixuan and explained, "Because of this, when Murong Sixuan asked me about Feng Xunyu's first love, I couldn't answer. After all, I have no recollection of that time."
Feng Guyu brushed her hair back and continued, "I knew that Feng Xunyu's dream was to become a detective. So, as the newly transformed Feng Xunyu, I resolutely left HZ City, the place filled with sorrow, and headed south to G City, where I found a job at a private detective agency.
The reason I made the difficult decision to distance myself from my parents was twofold: first, to escape the shadow of Feng Yinxuan and 'Feng Guyu's' deaths; second, the buried personality of Feng Guyu occasionally conveyed two vague messages to me: one, that my father was a murderer and I must stay away; two, that my mother didn't care about Feng Guyu's life or death and there was no need for attachment.
Even though by then I had completely become Feng Xunyu and couldn't fully grasp these two messages, it solidified one thought in my mind: I had to leave my parents!"
After finishing this lengthy explanation, Feng Guyu finally paused. Her gaze was piercing as it locked onto Feng Leng, as if it could penetrate through him.
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