Better to Have Loved 5: Pipi's Premonition
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He ate slowly, and I watched him for a while longer. 0
 
He looked up, his gaze gentle, "What's wrong?" 0
 
"Nothing, you just look good while eating." 0
 
He smiled slightly, "Flattery." 0
 
I took Pipi to its little room. 0
 
I grabbed some dog food and fed it to him. 0
 
As I petted its head, I watched it eat. 0
 
It occasionally looked up at me and wagged its tail. 0
 
Pipi, after mom is gone, you have to be well. 0
 
You must be happy. 0
 
Pipi seemed to sense something, suddenly stopping its eating and rubbing against me insistently. 0
 
I laughed, "Pipi, stop it." 0
 
It continued to nuzzle against me, letting out whimpering sounds. 0
 
As I laughed, a sudden wave of metallic sweetness surged in my throat. 0
 
I covered my mouth with my hand and looked down. 0
 
My hand was covered in blood. 0
 
Pipi suddenly barked and rushed towards me. 0
 
I gently patted its head, "Don't be afraid, Pipi, mommy is fine." 0
 
Pipi kept circling around me. 0
 
 
Xiao Cheng finished washing the dishes and called out to me from the kitchen. 0
 
I didn't respond. 0
 
He called out again. 0
 
I had no choice but to comfort Pipi and walk out of the room. "What's wrong?" 0
 
Xiao Cheng stared at me for a moment. "Nothing, I saw your door closed and thought something might be wrong." 0
 
I laughed at him. "What could possibly happen to me?" 0
 
Xiao Cheng walked over to me and took my hand. "How about going on a vacation to an island in the next few days?" 0
 
"Sure," I replied. 0
 
Xiao Cheng continued, "There's a dinner next Wednesday. Will you accompany me?" 0
 
"No, thanks." 0
 
Xiao Cheng paused for a moment and nodded. "Alright." 0
 
He didn't ask anything further. 0
 
But I knew in my heart that if Yong Nan spoke up, Xiao Cheng would probably take her with him behind my back. 0
 
After all, Yong Nan is the one he truly cares about. 0
 
And I am merely a substitute. 0
 
A substitute that won't last long, one that is nearing its end. 0
 
No, I want to go. 0
 
 
I didn't want Xiao Cheng to take Yong Nan with him. 0
 
So, I forced myself to go. 0
 
The banquet. 0
 
The lights were dazzling, glasses clinked, and the air was filled with the scent of perfume. 0
 
Everyone was dressed elegantly, except for me. 0
 
I stood alone at the edge of the banquet, like an intruder. 0
 
I felt a vague sense of unease. 0
 
Soon, I spotted Xiao Cheng in the crowd. 0
 
He was wearing a suit, standing out among the others. 0
 
Beside him was Yong Nan in a red dress, radiant and striking. 0
 
They moved through the guests, laughing and chatting happily. 0
 
Watching them felt like seeing a scene from the future. 0
 
I had actually envisioned such a scene long ago. 0
 
But seeing it in person hit me like a heavy blow. 0
 
My heart raced, tightening painfully as if it were about to burst. 0
 
I watched them, saw Xiao Cheng turn his head and speak gently to Yong Nan. 0
 
He smiled a couple of times, his eyes filled with warmth and joy. 0
 
 
I think he must really like Yong Nan. 0
 
Someone pointed at me. 0
 
I was dressed simply and looked noticeably thin. 0
 
I didn't dare to look in the mirror, afraid of seeing my increasingly prominent cheekbones and the faint hint of a skeletal face. 0
 
Xiao Cheng's expression changed; it looked terrible. 0
 
He pushed through the crowd and walked towards me. 0
 
I smiled at him and turned to leave the banquet. 0
 
14 0
 
I don't know how I got home. 0
 
I slammed the door behind me, and my mind felt like a tangled mess. 0
 
It twisted and turned, wrapping around my heart, making it impossible for me to stay calm. 0
 
My heart raced, a mix of destructive urges and brutality surging within my chest. 0
 
I swept all the papers, pens, and books off the table onto the floor. 0
 
The crashing sound was like some kind of instrument, giving me an almost perverse sense of satisfaction. 0
 
 
 
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