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墨書 Inktalez
Su Hailu looked at him and continued to ask, "Do you not talk when you're dating her? What a strange way to be in a relationship."
Su Hailu couldn't believe that two people in love would not talk to each other.
An Shaojie didn't respond, and Su Hailu kept staring at him. How much self-control did he have to be able to read without being affected by someone's prolonged gaze?
Finally, he turned the book in his hands upside down and placed it on the table.
"I hardly talk to her either when we're together, but it doesn't feel dull," he said, looking directly at her. Then he got up to pour himself some water.
Su Hailu was stunned for a moment before she reacted and hurriedly followed him into the kitchen, asking, "What do you mean?"
After pouring the water, An Shaojie walked back to the room, and she followed him there.
"What do you mean?" Su Hailu continued to ask.
Having been with him for so long, Su Hailu's spoiled temperament had been softened by his calm demeanor, but there were still times when she couldn't help herself. His response and attitude indeed annoyed her; she no longer had the mindset of wanting to find a topic to chat about as soon as she entered the room, and her voice inevitably rose a bit.
"It means nothing!" he replied slowly as he entered the room.
Su Hailu tugged at his arm, causing some of the water in his cup to splash onto his clothes and arms. The water was probably a bit hot; he quickly set the cup down on the table and exclaimed irritably, "What are you trying to do?"
Initially planning to soften her approach after realizing she had caused trouble, she bent down to help wipe the water off him. But upon hearing his shout, Su Hailu looked at him as if she didn't recognize him. A sudden stubbornness surged within her; she picked up the cup he had placed on the table and slammed it down hard, saying, "Hey, I need to clarify what you meant by that earlier!"
He slowly sat down, wiping the water off the table while answering calmly, "It means nothing. I don't need to talk when I'm with her." Although his voice was soft and low, there was an air of cold indifference that pushed people away.
"You..." Su Hailu was taken aback but felt even angrier inside. She shouted, "What do you really mean?"
He slowly stood up and faced her. He was a head taller than her; standing in front of her created an invisible pressure that forced Su Hailu to take a step back. However, he stepped forward again and said word by word, "Because when I'm with her, even if I don't speak, she often talks, so it doesn't feel dull."
After saying that, he picked up the book again, preparing to read.
Su Hailu took the book from his hands once more, puzzled, and asked, "But when I used to talk, didn't you always complain about the noise and put on your headphones?"
"Because what you talk about..." An Shaojie put down the book and continued, "are topics I'm not interested in and also don't understand."
Su Hailu was taken aback, standing behind him and reflecting on what topics she usually discussed with him.
She had attended a certain cultural performance, rushed to a party organized by someone whose parents were influential figures, watched a fashion show, and had a meal at a luxurious restaurant that cost an astonishing amount. These were all topics she found interesting and were part of her life and activities since coming abroad.
Indeed, these were topics he found uninteresting and incomprehensible.
As for cultural performances, he would occasionally accompany her to see a show organized by Chinese students or a more upscale performance featuring celebrities from various countries.
Regarding parties, he had mentioned that he disliked the bizarre atmosphere of such events; he only occasionally danced at parties organized by Chinese students or sang an old-fashioned song.
He was even less concerned about clothing. Back in China, he wore a plain gray jacket every day. After coming abroad, to maintain appearances for her sake, she bought him several sets of branded suits. He accepted them without resistance but ended up wearing those same suits every day without variation. He had no sense of fashion or sensitivity towards clothing; simplicity and comfort were all that mattered to him.
As for meals, there was no need to mention it. Upon arriving abroad, the first thing he did was buy a pot and stove; to this day, they had never eaten Western food at home. His cooking was no different from back in China—he cooked every day. She looked down on cooking and laundry; she preferred dining out and having her clothes washed outside. Watching him enjoy these household chores made her curious; wasn't it said that people engaged in research weren't good at or didn't like such mundane tasks?
However, he was different. Not only did he personally handle these chores, but after finishing them, he could immediately immerse himself in reading or head to the laboratory to work diligently.
She had always been an observer; she couldn't do these things herself and could only watch him do them. She could never settle down to do such tasks; when she attempted them, she became easily impatient. Yet he remained calm and unhurried, managing one task after another methodically, as if his life followed a routine.
Su Hailu stood behind him for a long time before finally asking slowly, "Then what topics did she talk about?"
She noticed his back suddenly straighten as if he was deep in thought.
Yes, when they were together, what topics did she talk about? It seemed like she hadn't said much, yet it also felt like she had said a lot. Otherwise, why had she never made him feel bored?
He thought for a moment; perhaps it was some professional topics. That was all he could guess. After being with someone for several years, even over twenty years, recalling what she had talked about with him relied on mere speculation.
"Probably some professional topics," he said without turning around, still sitting up straight.
"Professional topics?" Su Hailu laughed lightly. "You mean to say that these are things I could never achieve, right? Even if I talked about my profession with you, you might not be interested or even understand, right? So even if I tried my best, I couldn't compare to her, could I?"
He remained silent.
Su Hailu raised her voice and asked again, "Isn't that so?"
Only then did he mumble, "Not entirely; sometimes she didn't talk about professional topics either."
"What else did she talk about?" Su Hailu pondered and said, "Did she say she loved you? Or ask if you loved her?"
"She never said she loved me, nor did she ever ask if I loved her."
Yes, after so many years together, if he couldn't remember what she had said to him, he clearly remembered that she had never told him she loved him. She had never asked him if he loved her.
A look of disbelief appeared on Su Hailu's face. Two young lovers who had been together for years had never exchanged words like "I love you." Who would believe that?
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