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"Although you might not want to hear me speak, there are some things I still want to tell you." My throat was sore and painful, but I endured it just to explain to Wang Yue: "Wang Yue, you are an adult too. You must have drunk before; don't you know what happens when you get drunk? If I wanted to seduce Lu Ming, I wouldn't wait for him to call you over. I don't understand why you're angry with me."
Wang Yue's initial anger was still contained, but upon hearing my words, she no longer held back and sarcastically replied, "Then why didn't you just go up yourself or ask a waiter to take you up? You were hugging Lu Ge's neck pretty tightly; don't tell me you don't remember that!"
Hearing Wang Yue recount my actions from yesterday made me feel embarrassed. Although Wang Yue usually radiated a dislike for me, her open display of anger suggested that I must have truly done something to upset her. It's better to avoid unnecessary conflict, so I decided to apologize.
"I'm really sorry, Wang Yue. I haven't drunk this much in a long time, and I can't recall what I did. Of course, I didn't mean to cause any trouble for Lu Ming or you; it's my fault, and I apologize."
Regardless of her anger, she took care of me yesterday, so I should thank her for that.
Wang Yue still wore a smile that concealed her irritation. After I finished speaking, she replied in a muffled tone, "Well, I really don't know anymore. Who can you trust these days?"
My relationship with Lu Ming is too shallow, and even more so with Wang Yue. Her repeated sarcasm was indeed uncomfortable to hear, but I had to thank her for what happened yesterday; enduring it would serve as my way of expressing gratitude.
"Wang Yue, you're still young and good-looking. Even if you can't be with Lu Ming, you can find a decent man. I'm a few years older than you and already have a husband. Even if we were divorced, anyone with good judgment would know who to choose if we stood together. There's no need for you to see me as a rival; Lu Ming isn't foolish. Just focus on being yourself, and he'll know how to choose."
Life has become increasingly confusing. As I thought about advising Wang Yue to focus on herself, I couldn't help but laugh. If only I had been able to do the same when I first entered marriage—if I could have been even half as composed as Miao Miao—I wouldn't have ended up in such a terrible situation. Logically speaking, I shouldn't be giving advice to Wang Yue; I'm merely sharing some of my mistakes as someone who has been through it.
"You don't need to worry about my matters, Sister Zhuang. I know what I'm doing. Besides, if Lu Ge really wanted something with you, he wouldn't have waited until now; he can't possibly have such poor judgment."
After throwing a couple of jabs at me, Wang Yue changed the subject and asked what I wanted to eat. Although I was genuinely hungry, I didn't want to stay here any longer with Wang Yue. As I got out of bed and prepared to get dressed, Wang Yue pointed at the cabinet beside the bed: "Your clothes from last night smell like alcohol; how can you wear those? This is new clothing that Lu Ge asked me to bring for you; go ahead and wear it."
Wang Yue turned away while I quickly put on the new outfit. After thanking her once more, I hurriedly left the hotel.
I called Miao Miao from the taxi, but it was Wang Nan who answered.
"She's still sleeping. If there's anything you want me to tell her, just let me know."
"No need for that; let her rest. I just wanted to check if she's feeling better. Since everything's fine, that's all right then. Thank you for yesterday too, Wang Nan; sorry for bothering you."
"Not at all."
"Really, Miao Miao must have made things difficult for you. I'm truly sorry."
On the other end of the phone, Wang Nan chuckled lightly, "Don't apologize to me again. If she hears it, she'll get mad at me."
We both laughed a little, but after hanging up, I couldn't muster any more cheerfulness. The mess behind me was the reality I had to face after sobering up. How was I going to win this divorce case and reclaim everything that belonged to me?
There was still much to consider.
When I got home, my dad was at work, and my mom was in the living room watching TV. She called me over as soon as she saw me return. Just as I sat down, she asked,
"Who were you with yesterday?"
I reached for the red orange on the table, peeling off a bit of the thin skin and taking out the flesh to hand it to her. "I was with Miao Miao. We had a bit to drink last night and stayed out."
"Then why did you call and it sounded like a man's voice?"
Before I could hand the orange to my mom, I felt awkward and explained, "It was a friend of Miao Miao who went with us. He helped me make the call because I was in the bathroom throwing up. It's nothing, Mom."
My mom seemed unsure whether to believe me. After a few minutes, she couldn't help but remind me again, "Zhuang Jun, you're going through a divorce right now. Don't complicate things further. You said you were going to talk to a lawyer yesterday; how did that go?"
I knew my mom was worried that Wang Xu would use Lu Ming against me, but there really wasn't anything between Lu Ming and me. We hadn't seen each other for so long; nothing would happen. However, I felt embarrassed to share everything the lawyer said with my mom. I simply told her that I wanted a divorce and that Wang Xu had to agree.
"Why doesn't Wang Xu agree?" my mom suddenly asked.
To be honest, Wang Xu's attitude puzzled me too. Previously, I might have thought he still had feelings for me, but he had been hiding Deng Xiaomei from me without giving any real explanation. Why wouldn't he agree?
"Mom, I don't know either. Maybe he has some plans of his own. But I really want a divorce; I can't continue living with either him or his mother."
The tips of my nails pressed into the orange peel in my hand, leaving marks just like the indelible impressions left by Wang Xu and his mother on my heart—deep scars that I couldn't ignore.
Unlike before, my mom's attitude had shifted to support my decision to divorce. She echoed what Attorney Jin had said, advising me to let go of immediate interests as long as it didn't drag on any longer.
"Are you saying it's Wang Xu? Is he dragging this out to avoid dividing the assets?" My mom suddenly held my hand, looking suspicious as if she had just remembered something.
I shook my head. "Mom, I don't know."
"Then ask him if that's the reason."
If Wang Xu is really doing this for that reason, it makes sense. Now that I'm forcing him to hand over Deng Xiaomei's house, could it be that he wants to delay things until he can secure that property?
It’s possible, but the likelihood is slim.
"Zhuang Jun, you're not a child anymore. If you divorce now, there might still be other options. Don't drag this out any longer. Talk to Wang Xu about what it would take for him to agree to the divorce. You can negotiate; just get the divorce done first."
My mom kept urging me not to delay. She said while I still didn't have children and was still young, finding someone else wouldn't be too difficult. She was worried that Wang Xu would waste more of my time. There was no future for us; dragging it out was just a waste.
I understood her concerns, but after everything with Wang Xu, I couldn't muster the motivation to remarry. Even if I did meet someone good later on, if they asked why I divorced, how would I explain? Maybe because I couldn't have children? What would they think? No one is a saint; there's no need to take on too much responsibility for someone else's life.
"I understand, Mom. I'll think about it."
Saying I'd think about it didn't mean I had any plans for the future. I couldn't bear the thought of experiencing the same pain again. For now, I just needed to focus on living well in the present.
At four in the afternoon, Miao Miao called me in a hoarse voice, saying she had just woken up and wanted to come over for dinner. I told her to come to my place first. After she agreed and hung up, less than an hour later, there was a knock at the door. Thinking it was Miao Miao, I went to open it but found Wang Xu instead.
"What are you doing here?" I frowned.
Wang Xu seemed a bit happier than usual, carrying several bags. He nudged the door with his elbow and tried to come in. I held onto the doorknob to stop him, but he was stronger and pushed his way inside effortlessly, thwarting my attempt to keep him out.
"I'm here to bring some goodies for your parents since the New Year is coming up. This cured meat and sausage are all from my hometown—smoked wild boar meat, really fragrant! Oh, and since Dad likes to drink a bit, I brought a bottle of sorghum liquor. Is Dad still at work? What about Mom? Mom?"
Wang Xu wandered around the house as if he were familiar with it, checking the kitchen and then looking at the living room balcony. Not seeing my mom, he returned to stand in front of me with a big smile.
I maintained a stern expression and couldn't manage a smile at all.
"Take your things away. My parents won't want them."
He seemed not to understand my words, grabbing my hand and pulling me along. "Look, it's almost New Year, and you're still frowning. I talked to Mom and decided that this year we should celebrate New Year at our parents' place. Let's see where they want to go, and we can all go out together. They've worked hard for so many years; it's time for them to relax and have some fun."
Hearing Wang Xu's "wonderful" plan made me particularly frustrated. "Wang Xu, do you really think we can still go on a family trip together peacefully?"
I couldn't tell if it was Wang Xu's fanciful thinking or my own stinginess that made him so carefree.
"Of course we can. Once Mom and Dad come back, I'll talk to them properly. I'll apologize for what happened before, and from now on, we'll live well as a couple."
Wang Xu continued his lengthy monologue of lamentations. I was impatiently wanting to refute him when the front door suddenly rang again. I immediately thought of Miao Miao but didn't rush to open the door right away. Wang Xu finally stopped, looked at me, then at the door.
"Why aren't you going to open the door? Who's coming?"
He became alert and stepped ahead of me toward the door. The moment he opened it, I could only see Miao Miao's shocked face twist into anger, and then I noticed the bag in her hand as she swung it directly at Wang Xu's head.
"You dog! How dare you come here?!"
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