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Day by day, I continued working at Gu Xiang's place. Although I was reluctant, Miao Miao chose to leave with Wang Nan to develop abroad, planning to return when the time was right. After all, this was a matter between Miao Miao and Wang Nan. On the day of their departure, those invited included me, Gu Xiang, Lu Ming, and Qin Yi.
Before we could say much, Miao Miao's eyes were already red. Holding her wine glass with both hands, she choked out, "I think everyone knows why we're here today. Wang Nan and I had no choice but to leave. Perhaps we won't see each other for a while, so I hope you all won't forget me."
Such joking words only added to the sadness; how could anyone forget Miao Miao? Even if she were to be gone for ten or twenty years, I would still remember her—a wonderful girl who had always been there to help and support me. She was cheerful and lovely, and it would be hard to find someone like her again.
Wang Nan urged Miao Miao to cheer up, saying it wasn't a big deal. We are all adults; focusing on the future is important. If we want to meet again, there will always be opportunities. Miao Miao nodded with red eyes but wiped them with the back of her hand. Wang Nan gently patted her head and whispered comforting words.
To be honest, I felt the saddest among everyone here. As Wang Nan said, most men know how to weigh pros and cons; it's natural to pursue what seems better. But in my eyes, Miao Miao was my only friend. The thought of her leaving made me feel uneasy.
"Zhuang Jun, look at you—stop making a fuss and crying. It's not a big deal; they might come back at any time. Don't overthink it," Gu Xiang said in a tone that was both helpless and amusing as he handed me a napkin.
I shot him a glare: "Aren't you supposed to be a psychologist? Can't you understand how I'm feeling right now?"
Gu Xiang tilted his head and replied helplessly, "Didn't I say before? After work, you all are my friends. I'm just an ordinary person looking at these things from a normal perspective. Alright, alright, wipe your eyes."
When talking to Gu Xiang, I felt guilty; even though Miao Miao was sitting right next to me, we tacitly avoided looking at each other. She probably understood like I did that if we really looked at each other, tonight would not just end with red eyes.
We forced ourselves to chat and joke around at the table, reminiscing about the past and discussing the future. But time always comes to an end; Miao Miao and Wang Nan had a flight at ten ten tomorrow morning, and it was already close to midnight—they needed some time to prepare.
As we stepped out of the restaurant, the cold evening breeze blew gently. Miao Miao said goodbye one by one to everyone present before finally walking up to me. After lowering her head for a moment, she looked up at me with emotions thick and complex in her eyes.
"Zhuang Jun, I'm really leaving."
With those words from Miao Miao, tears streamed down my face instantly. Looking at her again, she didn't seem much better off than I was.
Since Miao Miao mentioned leaving until now, we hadn't discussed it further—perhaps we both wanted to avoid the topic because it was too sad and filled with negative emotions. We didn't want it to explode early; that would be too terrible.
Even now, I want to avoid this topic altogether. I hope tomorrow's flight is just an illusion and not real—that Miao Miao will still be by my side and that we will remain best friends.
I nodded vigorously, "You must take good care of yourself over there. It's unfamiliar territory, so you need to get used to it slowly. I know you're very adaptable, but still, be extremely careful, okay?"
After all, it's not like any place in our country; every country has its own customs and habits. It always takes time to adjust when you first arrive. My concern isn't about Miao Miao's abilities; I'm worried that she might miss home and want to come back.
"I know, and you too. Take good care of yourself. Now that there's nothing much going on, just rest well. I've already talked to Gu Xiang about it. If he dares to bully you, I'll really come back right away to deal with him. You need to pay attention to your health and rest; don't dwell on the past anymore; it's all behind us."
Yes, don't think about the past anymore; she's absolutely right.
Miao Miao understands me the best, from beginning to end.
During this time after the divorce, I've found it harder to let go than I imagined. I keep recalling the past day and night, fantasizing about what it would have been like if Lu Ming hadn't intervened—what kind of scene Wang Xu and I would be in now, both good and bad scenarios have crossed my mind.
Perhaps we would be arguing over not having children by now, with my mother-in-law still making things difficult for me. Or maybe I would already be pregnant, with Wang Xu and my mother-in-law bustling around just to ensure the safe birth of the child in my belly. I've considered every possibility.
Compared to my harsh judgment of Wang Xu, I ultimately can't forgive myself; I didn't do well in this aspect of marriage.
Holding Miao Miao tightly, my silent tears turned into loud sobs. People nearby stood calmly watching us embrace and cry. When we finally released each other, Miao Miao's eyes were quite swollen.
"I won't see you off tomorrow; you must take good care of yourself."
Thinking about it, if I were to go to the airport to send off Miao Miao tomorrow, it would probably be even harder than now. Gu Xiang was right; even though I'm an adult, I have no immunity against such separations. It feels like when we were kids swapping seats in class—thinking that leaving my deskmate meant losing everything.
In the end, we parted ways. I sat in Gu Xiang's car and cried even harder. Gu Xiang helplessly said, "If you want to cry, just go ahead; I have plenty of tissues in the car. I'm very generous; feel free to use them."
Before Gu Xiang could say anything else, I had already taken a stack of tissues from my lap and was crying loudly without holding back my voice. The sound of Gu Xiang's intermittent comforting words barely registered with me; he must have noticed this too because he gradually stopped talking.
Eventually, Gu Xiang drove me to a quiet mountaintop, parked the car, and asked if I wanted to get out for a walk. I shook my head and stayed in the car; it felt just fine.
In the end, Gu Xiang didn't go out either; he just sat in the car with me and turned on the radio. A female voice began to sing elegantly, beautifully captivating me, and gradually, I stopped crying.
"It seems we really need some professional knowledge to handle situations like this," Gu Xiang said with a bitter smile. He turned around and unexpectedly pinched my cheek.
"I heard that if women cry too much, their faces will swell, but your face has always been this big. I guess the rumors might be false."
I couldn't help but chuckle at Gu Xiang's teasing and pretended to glare at him fiercely.
"Even in this state, you still make fun of me."
"It's precisely because you're like this that I tease you," Gu Xiang replied nonchalantly, a hidden smile at the corner of his mouth that I caught.
I looked at him helplessly, and he returned my gaze with an expression that seemed to say, "Trust me."
I really didn't know what to say.
To be honest, I'm glad Gu Xiang was there with me; otherwise, I wouldn't know how long I would have cried. He suddenly asked about my relationship with Miao Miao. I paused for a moment and slowly told him about how we became good friends.
As I recounted our experiences together, I realized that my time with Miao Miao had always been enjoyable. She was like the sun, full of endless energy, a source of motivation. I saw so many shining qualities in her; she was even a goal for me to learn from and emulate.
"You don't know, during university, Miao Miao was quite famous for her excellence. Everyone knew her and praised her as a capable person. Very few people spoke ill of Miao Miao; mostly, it was just jealousy. It seemed she never cared much about what others said; she believed as long as she did well herself, that was enough."
Gu Xiang didn't say a word but listened seriously. I continued speaking.
"So, being friends with Miao Miao surprised me. In my eyes, someone like her should be friends with equally outstanding people. Yet in the end, she turned out to be my closest friend. In many ways, she helped me a lot."
"Zhuang Jun, think about it from another perspective: doesn't Miao Miao want to be friends with outstanding people?"
I was taken aback, unable to respond. "What?"
"Miao Miao is such a capable person; she must know this too. So she is actually doing what you think she is, which is being friends with outstanding people. You are seen as an excellent presence in Miao Miao's eyes, so stop feeling sorry for yourself and thinking it's unbelievable to be friends with Miao Miao."
Gu Xiang's words surprised me. At least I had never heard such statements before. I felt that the term "outstanding" only applied to someone like Miao Miao, and had nothing to do with me.
"Perhaps others haven't noticed your shining points, but Mu Miaomiao has. Her greatest strength must be her keen insight. You've mentioned how much help you've received from Miao Miao over the years; she has probably also benefited from you in many ways, but you just haven't paid attention."
I gave a wry smile. What Gu Xiang said was something I had never dared to think before. Even now, hearing it felt somewhat absurd. However, there was no doubt that such words provided me comfort and courage, suggesting that nothing was truly out of reach.
"She will come back, and you will be lifelong friends. Don't worry; it's just a matter of time. Just think of it as living alone for now. Don't you still have us?"
"You guys..." I murmured softly, knowing who exactly Gu Xiang was referring to.
"Yes, we have always regarded you as a friend, and we believe you feel the same way. But please don't say anything about whether you are worthy or not; such thoughts are foolish."
Without a doubt, Gu Xiang's comforting words were very effective. When I stopped crying and looked at the view from the mountaintop again, my mood became very pleasant. I firmly believed that Miao Miao would return; it was just a matter of time.
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