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墨書 Inktalez
Cranium had suffered damage, which could lead to temporary amnesia, but the human self-repair ability could consciously restore memories in a short time. However, once a drug that suppressed nerve transmission was taken, the self-repair capability of the nerves connected to that part would gradually weaken, and those memories would be imprisoned in the river of time.
Memory gap.
Xu Nuan sat alone, unable to accept that the person who repeatedly handed her that drug after her injury last May was him.
The one who caused her memory gap was actually him.
Xu Nuan truly believed she had been abandoned by the entire world.
An abandoned person had no future.
The seemingly powerful yet inconsistently effective creature was dealt with by Xu Hang and his companions. During their cleanup, they discovered that this creature's physical structure was quite peculiar. The skull resembled that of an animal, indicating its intelligence did not reach human levels. Its upper body was mechanical, allowing it to be manipulated by hidden individuals, transforming its wings into arms, while its legs were artificially designed to resemble human ones. To them, a creature that combined these three elements was already considered lifeless.
However, they were very interested in how such a lifeless being was created and why it was released before fully maturing. Thus, they continued their discussion while cleaning up the aftermath.
Xu Hang had long noticed something was off with Xu Nuan, who sat near a boulder. He intended to approach her for a few questions but saw Gu Ze hurriedly emerge from the remnants of a tent, carrying a pile of items. He then retreated and continued discussing the creature's structure with Deng Yinyin and Xie Huai, using his height to block Deng Yinyin's view.
An abandoned person did not need to feel sorrow because sadness could not change what had already happened and become reality.
Xu Nuan thought she felt no sadness. Since entering the game, all she had experienced was sorrow; her heart, already battered and bruised, had grown numb. The emptiness inside her had become so vast that nothing could fill it. She suddenly realized she no longer had any reason to continue playing the game.
As she sank into her thoughts and struggled to calm herself enough to sort through those memories, someone appeared behind her. A faint scent of alcohol wafted over, and she felt a strong irritation at the spot on the back of her head where she had been injured.
Xu Nuan abruptly turned her head away from Gu Ze's touch and coldly threw out a remark.
"You don't need to handle this."
She stumbled to her feet, intending to find her backpack.
The Lonely Beast had always been the one to inflict wounds upon herself. After being abandoned, she was left all alone; she had once possessed a group of people, she had held the entire world in her hands. But now, her world was empty, and she no longer wanted to let anyone in. Even if someone lingered at the door of that world, almost able to enter, she could harden her heart and shut that door, leaving herself alone.
Before she could fully rise, she was yanked back by the person behind her. Instinctively, she wanted to attack, and the short knife in her hand pressed against Gu Ze's abdomen. Just a little more pressure, and it could turn into a scene of bloodshed.
"Warm, are you still lost in the fight from earlier?"
As Xu Nuan looked at the short knife with surprise and annoyance, Gu Ze's familiar voice, laced with laughter, echoed in her ears.
This person knew nothing; that was why he could smile so freely.
Xu Nuan angrily retracted the short knife and tossed it carelessly to the ground before coldly commanding, "Let go."
To her surprise, she noticed confusion and hurt flash in Gu Ze's eyes.
She had to do this; the mark she saw during the day was a joke, and at night, under Deng Yinyin's influence, Gu Ze's constant care had also become a farce.
"Warm, what are you doing?"
Gu Ze did not release his grip, as if letting go would mean losing something precious. He tightened his hold on Xu Nuan's arm even more.
Xu Nuan felt impatient; the pain in her head, the throbbing at the back of her skull, and the stabbing ache in her heart made it hard for her to breathe. Everything was pushing her toward losing control.
"You should take care of those who need your attention instead of wasting time on me."
She forced herself to say those words. Just outside the Supply Station, she had felt a flicker of emotion; yet within a single day, that flicker had transformed into anger and disappointment, gradually sinking into Silence as deep as water.
She could firmly believe that from now on, she would be alone.
"What do you mean by that, Nuan?"
Gu Ze, who had been holding her with one hand while clutching the medication in the other, lost his smile. Anger and confusion flickered in his eyes, and his tone grew much heavier.
"I have always wanted to take care of you. Don't you understand that by now?"
When all one receives from relentless giving is disappointment, even the strongest person can gradually become fragile, even to the point of making regrettable choices.
Feeling the grip on her arm tighten, Xu Nuan suddenly recalled what Gu Ze had done to her during that incident at the cliff.
"I don't believe that someone who once forced me would genuinely care for me. Your care might just be another form of harm."
Her heart was already a raging inferno, but Xu Nuan maintained the coldest and most sarcastic expression as she looked at Gu Ze. It was her truth; her hands could no longer embrace anyone.
The hand gripping her arm suddenly loosened. Having achieved her goal, Xu Nuan felt an emptiness inside her. She missed the pain in Gu Ze's eyes as she turned to leave. This was the ending she desired; she should be happy. Yet, why did it feel so difficult?
Ah, it must be because her head was injured again. In this place without a hospital, her head had suffered repeated injuries and might leave serious aftereffects. Yes, she was definitely feeling this way out of concern for that.
Before Xu Nuan could take two steps away, a hand grabbed her again. Following that force, she spun around and found herself pulled into an embrace. The grip around her waist was so tight that she feared it might break.
"What do you want now?"
Xu Nuan tried hard to appear indifferent, tilting her head up to look at Gu Ze, only to find his eyes so dark they seemed impenetrable, thick with emotion.
In her moment of surprise, Gu Ze slowly lowered his head.
This time, due to the pain in her head, Xu Nuan reacted quickly. She turned her head away just in time to leave Gu Ze grasping at air before she let out a cold laugh.
"Are you trying to force me again? Is this your version of care? Your pursuit? So this is what kind of man you are."
It was a man like this who had saved her multiple times, a man like this who pursued her, and a man like this who left her with shadows.
Should she laugh or cry?
However, it wasn't surprising that a man like this would do such things, because he was a man.
Gu Ze's expression turned pained once again. Maintaining that posture, he couldn't help but soften his tone.
"Nuannuan, what happened? Why have you suddenly become so heartless? Just the other day, you were still..."
Xu Nuan wouldn't let Gu Ze finish his sentence, but she also lacked the strength to stop him.
"I have always been heartless. I am a heartless woman; you should have known that by now."
So, stay away from her. Being with someone who loves him is better than loving someone else.
"Tell me, please. What happened?"
Gu Ze remained persistent on this point. Some things, if not addressed in time, could lead to great misunderstandings.
"Is it because you hit your head and remembered something? But in your past memories, there is no part of me. I haven't hurt you; I won't hurt you."
Xu Nuan admitted that Gu Ze was an extremely intelligent man, and she had to acknowledge that she had misdirected her anger.
In her past, there was no Gu Ze; she shouldn't have taken out her frustrations on him. However, there would be no Gu Ze in her future either. So let it be; let the mistakes continue until it all comes to an end.
"A man must take responsibility for what he has done," Xu Nuan thought of another phrase, even though she was reluctant to admit it was true. "You know what you've done; you need to take responsibility for that person. You are no longer my Pursuer."
As she finished the last half of her sentence, Xu Nuan truly realized what she had lost. The wound in her heart had been torn wider by the cold wind, becoming a chasm, becoming an abyss.
"What are you writing? Who do I need to be accountable to?"
What she did not expect was that Gu Ze would erupt with immense anger at this remark, completely disregarding the fact that a few others nearby would notice their interaction.
"I only need to be responsible for you."
Xu Nuan smiled lightly, her demeanor cold and tinged with mockery.
Men and women alike are always unwilling to back down in words.
"Promises that cannot be fulfilled do not need to be made; they only serve to make one seem ridiculous."
Before this moment, Xu Nuan had never imagined she would speak such harsh and sharp words to Gu Ze, the warm man. She felt as if she was no longer herself.
She thought Gu Ze would be angered enough to walk away and ignore her; she thought he might lose control and do something irreparable, giving her a reason to cut off contact with him. However, in her life, the greatest variable had always been this man named Gu Ze.
"Is it that Deng Yinyin has done something to you?"
Gu Ze reacted quickly, his tone much more urgent.
"You just went out together to gather firewood, and after returning, you became uncomfortable and strange. It must be something she did to you. Are those words about responsibility referring to her?"
In truth, dealing with intelligent people often eliminates many unnecessary entanglements and misunderstandings. Yet some entanglements and misunderstandings are controlled by human emotions, not by wisdom. Even the smartest person can be blinded by feelings one day.
Faced with Gu Ze's inquiry, Xu Nuan turned her head away and fell silent.
Silence.
Gu Ze suddenly released her grip, his gaze dropping slightly as his face remained obscured in shadow.
Xu Nuan stepped back a few paces, biting her lower lip as she hesitated while looking at Gu Ze. Ultimately, she steeled herself and turned to leave.
In that moment of turning away, she heard Gu Ze's voice.
"You really don't trust me."
Because of her distrust, it was easy for her to be deceived by certain tactics. Otherwise, with Xu Nuan's intelligence, she would have seen through many inconsistencies at a glance.
"You don't trust my sincerity towards you."
Gu Ze's voice was low and weary, as if he had expended all his strength just to utter those words.
Xu Nuan paused in her steps, a sudden wave of pain surged within her, as if a hand were squeezing her heart. The ache far surpassed the pain in her head.
"Yes, I don't trust you."
She didn't trust him; she couldn't dare to trust him. Therefore, she didn't question Deng Yinyin's words. She believed that Gu Ze was capable of such actions, and she had no right to restrict his behavior. It was a chain reaction.
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