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"Have you found anything useful?"
After Xu Nuan turned Qin Yaojie's backpack inside out, Gu Ze asked this question, which was the first thing he said to Xu Nuan after Qin Yaojie's death.
Although the greatest obstacle had seemingly vanished for him, it now existed in a different, more profound way. Once someone who could easily engage in conversation with anyone, he now found himself at a loss for words and actions. It seemed that with that person's passing, both he and Xu Nuan had changed.
Xu Nuan looked up at him with a calm expression, but he could discern nothing from her face; all he saw in her once vibrant eyes was emptiness.
When Xu Nuan had been speaking with Zhou Long, he had firmly believed that her ultimate goal was to uncover the murderer of her parents and the mastermind behind her entry into the game, and that she would not be deterred by Qin Yaojie's death. Xu Nuan had later confirmed this to him, but now it seemed that both of them were merely deceiving themselves.
He almost believed that the bond between Xu Nuan and Qin Yaojie was an insurmountable chasm he could never cross. Just as he was about to succumb to this thought, he recalled Zhou Long's words about Qin Yaojie’s connection to the true instigator of the game and her relationship with it. If Qin Yaojie truly was one of the two founders of this game, then everything that had happened to Xu Nuan was likely tied to Qin Yaojie. In other words, Qin Yaojie had altered Xu Nuan's once peaceful life.
If he could analyze these connections without ever having interacted with Qin Yaojie, then surely Xu Nuan—who had pieced together everything from January to March of last year and regained memories from March to May due to another injury from Cranium—could also uncover these links.
It was a complicated mix of love and hate, far more intricate and unforgettable than mere affection or animosity. The woman he loved deeply had once again been hurt by that deceased man, leaving him powerless. During those years when he foolishly lived as a young master at Heng Technology, he failed to stand by Xu Nuan's side in time to prevent all of this.
What he wanted to know most was how this woman would choose.
It always happened like this: just when he felt their relationship was drawing closer and that there might be a chance for him—when he sensed that Xu Nuan had feelings for him—someone connected to that man or the game would appear at just the right moment, shattering their budding intimacy and returning everything to square one.
Xu Nuan stared at him for too long; long enough for him to replay all these thoughts in his mind while trying not to feel discouraged. He felt anxious about Xu Nuan's silence as he struggled under her gaze.
It was a look filled with deep emotions that defied specific description.
At that moment, he felt like a prisoner awaiting judgment.
If Xu Nuan could swallow this bitterness and still find the strength to move forward, then her heart would be strong enough that no one could stop her. Though his opportunities had been few, there remained a chance. And if such a Xu Nuan were to fall in love with him, he would gain a companion for life.
But if Xu Nuan were to collapse under this weight, no one could save her—and no one could save him either.
He desperately wanted to step forward and hold this woman close, allowing her to cry in his embrace. A person who wouldn’t even allow herself to cry indicated that her heart had already died. When the heart dies and grows cold, the body ceases to move.
This was not the ending he desired; he fought hard within this game for a resolution that would satisfy both sides. He needed to believe in his own capabilities and trust that the woman he loved could rise again.
With these thoughts swirling in his mind, Gu Ze took a few steps forward under Xu Nuan's indescribable gaze, crouching down before her so they could meet eye-to-eye.
“Xu Hang, a few people are still waiting for us. We have a new teammate to introduce to them. We need to get his body to the Supply Station before it starts to decay. There’s a lot we need to do, so…” Gu Ze paused, gazing directly into Xu Nuan's eyes.
“Can you stand up now?”
He wanted to cherish the woman who occupied his heart.
He thought Xu Nuan would take a long time to respond again, and he was prepared to wait, disregarding He Min's slightly surprised gaze. He just felt that Xu Nuan would understand the meaning behind his words. He would treasure and protect everything she valued, and he had only one request: that Xu Nuan could value herself.
Once, in a more comfortable urban life, he believed that love meant two people willing to live harmoniously together for a lifetime, waiting for each other without abandoning one another. But in this game, he realized that true love is about being willing to bear the weight of each other's lives and being happy to share that burden.
When they could shoulder each other's lives, they had already won half the battle in this game. Regardless of whether they both walked out together, one of them did, or neither did, their love had already blossomed into something beautiful and regret-free.
He felt fortunate to have understood this point. When he was willing to bear Xu Nuan's life, he wanted to entrust his own life to her as well. Perhaps their souls had not yet drawn close, but he was grateful that he was still alive and had time. By any means necessary, he could offer his life.
“Don’t worry, I won’t fall here.”
Just as He Min quietly observed the two of them locked in a gaze that seemed timeless, Xu Nuan finally spoke up. Her words reassured He Min while bringing a comforting smile to Gu Ze's face.
This was the Xu Nuan he loved, and he was willing to exhaust his life for her to fall in love with him.
Gu Ze took out a pair of binoculars from his backpack and handed them to Xu Nuan.
“Look for Xu Hang and the others.”
He nearly shoved the binoculars into her hands, not giving her a chance to refuse. He quickly pulled out a sleeping bag to carry Qin Yaojie’s body. Before this moment, he had never imagined that one day he would be collecting the remains of his rival.
Xu Nuan accepted Gu Ze's actions without protest; she simply took out a notebook and a medicine bottle from Qin Yaojie’s backpack and placed them into her own bag while leaving everything else in that backpack near the sleeping bag.
This action surprised He Min, who hadn’t seen Xu Nuan for months. She knew how deeply Xu Nuan had cared for Qin Yaojie in the past. Indeed, it seemed that Qin Yaojie had caused Xu Nuan pain now, but love and hate were intertwined with deep feelings; she didn’t believe Xu Nuan was someone who could easily forget such emotions. The only possibility was that during their separation over these months, Xu Nuan’s heart had unknowingly drawn closer to someone else.
With this thought in mind, He Min glanced at Gu Ze, who was diligently preparing Qin Yaojie’s body. A strange feeling rose within her. After her boyfriend Yu Hao passed away, she had been alone; no matter how difficult or dangerous the path ahead was, she bore it all by herself. The days without being pampered by family or Yu Hao were incredibly hard—so hard that she longed for someone to comfort her, someone whose shoulder she could lean on.
When she entered the game with her boyfriend and Xu Nuan, Xu Nuan had been desperately searching for Qin Yaojie; she looked so pitiful then. At that moment, He Min thought she was happy because she had her boyfriend by her side in this bloody game. After Yu Hao's death, she felt like the most unfortunate woman while Xu Nuan remained the pitiful one. Now with Qin Yaojie dead and leaving behind a conspiracy for Xu Nuan, she felt that Xu Nuan was the most unfortunate person of all. Yet this misfortune was shattered by the man before her; she began to envy Xu Nuan.
Such thoughts were fleeting as He Min straightened up and walked over to help Gu Ze. She refused to let those thoughts invade her mind again or lead her astray; however, while tidying up her thoughts, they unconsciously drifted away.
She had one thing she did not tell Xu Nuan. After joining the First Batch of Players, Qin Yaojie’s few words were all about inquiring about Xu Nuan, the torment before entering the game, and the dangers after entering it. Through these days of communication with Qin Yaojie, she realized that he still deeply loved Xu Nuan.
She believed her judgment was accurate. During the times when Qin Yaojie was weak and barely conscious, his world revolved around Xu Nuan. The murmurs in his coma and the longing discussions when awake were all about her. If he didn’t still love her, why would he torment himself with such feelings while suffering from illness?
Although it seemed to her that Qin Yaojie was the one who initiated the breakup and might have even manipulated Xu Nuan, he deserved this torment. However, seeing that man’s sorrow and pain as he called out the name of a woman he had pushed away made her feel pity for him. Gradually, she became aware that Qin Yaojie had his own sufferings; everything he did was filled with pain. The key point was that he never told her about this suffering, leaving her completely unaware and unable to explain anything to Xu Nuan after his death.
Now, witnessing Gu Ze’s care for Xu Nuan and seeing Xu Nuan choose to pick herself up after her grief, she no longer wanted to tell Xu Nuan about this matter.
Bringing this up now would only cause Xu Nuan more pain. It was enough for her to suffer alone; there was no need to add to Xu Nuan’s suffering.
She firmly believed that in this game, the only person she could trust and rely on was Xu Nuan. Therefore, she would take good care of Xu Nuan; she thought so and believed she would persevere.
Xu Nuan scanned the area with her binoculars and soon spotted Xu Hang and the others not far from their southeast direction. That direction also allowed a glimpse of a short row of Special Trees and a faintly visible white Supply Station.
The shorter distance hastened their reunion, but what Xu Hang and the others did not expect was that in just a few hours of separation, their team had gained a He Min and a corpse.
As Deng Yinyin’s curiosity got the better of her and she almost asked whose corpse it was, Xu Hang quickly covered her mouth and shot her a warning glance.
Deng Yinyin, sometimes clever yet muddled, realized who the corpse belonged to upon seeing Xu Nuan’s and Gu Ze’s expressions. In that moment, instead of feeling sorrow for another fallen comrade, she felt an overwhelming sense of crisis.
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