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墨書 Inktalez
No one came to disturb Xu Nuan and Gu Ze.
The others, though reluctant, had to admit that only Gu Ze could contain the nearly frantic Xu Nuan at this moment.
They had seen Xu Nuan lose control before, but back then, there was still some rationality left in her; her hands were not stained with blood, and she could be easily subdued. Now, time had passed, and Xu Nuan was no longer the person they once knew. They were not the same people who had first encountered her in her naive state.
This was a change that left both sides feeling despondent, and they had no choice but to accept it.
The others retreated far away, taking a brief respite while leaving Gu Ze to restrain the struggling Xu Nuan. One was frantically fighting against the bonds, while the other was trying to soothe her. Yet from a distance, their silhouettes appeared intertwined. The one filled with resentment and the one filled with regret believed that this entanglement was impossible to break.
"I'm sorry."
Gu Ze kept repeating those words. There were many things to apologize for, but at that moment, Xu Nuan did not want to hear them. She knew that Chi Ming had already gone far away and would eventually return on some future day to demand the answer she had promised him. Still, she wanted to break free from Gu Ze's embrace.
The restraint felt like an embrace.
What a ridiculous equation this was. Rather than wanting to chase after Chi Ming for a futile confrontation, she simply wanted to escape the warmth of the person behind her. Human body temperature is usually comforting, yet her back felt scorching hot. The heat caused her wounds to reopen and bleed, draining her life force and making her feel as if she were on the brink of death.
Xu Nuan was already exhausted; she couldn't break free, yet she still wanted to flee. If she sank again into her feelings for Gu Ze, it would be a descent from which there would be no return. She had once thought herself carefree in acknowledging her feelings for Gu Ze in her heart, but now she realized how naive she had been. What lay between her and Gu Ze was not just the deep-seated emotions of their past but also their differing attitudes toward life, their perspectives on the game, and the paths they would take in the future.
She had long known that she and Gu Ze would walk different roads; why cling to this fleeting moment of vulnerability?
To gain something only to lose it again is worse than never having gained it at all.
"Gu Ze, let me go."
Xu Nuan placed her hand over Gu Ze's—one hand battered and scarred, the other strong and defined.
"You have nothing to apologize for. I know it was a misunderstanding. I have already learned the truth; the one who was deceived is you."
Xu Nuan took advantage of Gu Ze's momentary daze to pry his hand away. Just as she was about to get up, Gu Ze pulled her back, holding her tightly.
The strength of his grip caused pain in her flesh and bones, and the person behind her showed no intention of easing his hold. Instead, he tightened his embrace as if he intended to bind her to him.
"Nuan, I have no words."
As Xu Nuan numbly allowed Gu Ze to hold her, a voice from behind made her shiver. What did that mean?
Had he given up? Resigned himself?
Suddenly, Xu Nuan felt as if Gu Ze's hand was not just holding her but squeezing her heart. The twisting pain blurred her vision, making everything unclear.
"I realize now that my previous thoughts were too naive. What did it matter to protect you with my life? That I would support you no matter what you did? I even fantasized about us leaving this game and having a brand new future."
Is that so? This man still remembered the promises he made, which meant he knew he could not fulfill them. Xu Nuan smiled faintly into the distance; this self-aware man should also know when to let go.
His future was never meant to include her. They should not be entangled at this moment; they each had their own goals, like two straight lines that would never intersect again after this brief encounter, only to drift further apart without ever meeting again.
Xu Nuan had forgotten how to breathe; she could no longer feel Gu Ze's strength.
"I will make no promises in the future."
Gu Ze's voice sounded just like it had in her dreams, but now she could not discern his emotions when he spoke those words.
She realized she had been abandoned. Suddenly, she no longer wanted to listen. She reached out and pried Gu Ze's hand away, but when she found he wouldn’t let go, she drew the short knife from his waist and slashed at his hand.
A line of blood appeared, and Xu Nuan felt dizzy from the sight of the crimson stain, yet Gu Ze still wouldn’t release her.
“If you don’t let go, I can’t guarantee where the next blade will land.”
Xu Nuan didn’t even realize the pain in her own voice. As she prepared to strike again, her gaze remained locked on that bloodstain.
“If this will help you feel better, go ahead and cut as you please.”
Gu Ze suddenly leaned his head against her shoulder, reminiscent of a long-ago evening filled with vibrant sunset hues when he had held her hand with the knife and plunged it into himself.
Sweet as honey.
Xu Nuan seemed to hear those words again. At that moment, she had felt something stir within her—no, it had been long before that. She had forgotten how many times she owed him a blade. If that was the case, then she would repay him; they would be even.
“I still owe you nine blades, right?”
Xu Nuan suddenly chuckled lightly, turning the knife toward herself and plunging it down into her abdomen. The pain jolted her back to reality, dispelling her dizziness. Behind her, Gu Ze hadn’t reacted until she muttered, “Now there are eight blades left,” at which point he anxiously grasped her hand in an attempt to wrest the knife away.
Xu Nuan refused to let go. She wore a self-satisfied, provocative smile that only deepened Gu Ze’s sorrow. They struggled over the knife, eventually grappling with each other. Most of the time, Xu Nuan used both hands and feet to push Gu Ze away while he tried to protect her from injuring herself, allowing her to attack him.
In the distance, a few people noticed the commotion and hesitated about whether to step in and help. Xie Huai suddenly grew tense and looked at Xu Hang in a panic.
“Did you hear something?”
Several people's attention was immediately drawn away.
Meanwhile, the struggle between Xu Nuan and Gu Ze continued. Xu Nuan had no strength left; she had just stabbed herself deeply and, after a short while, lost the strength to hold onto the knife. In an instant, Gu Ze flipped her over and pinned her down.
Xu Nuan glared at Gu Ze, breathing heavily.
"Why are you stopping me? If I return your words, we will owe each other nothing."
Gu Ze's expression revealed a vulnerability that was rarely seen, his eyes filled with sorrow as he stared intently at Xu Nuan.
"Don't say that, Nuan. Things haven't reached that point yet."
Xu Nuan scoffed but winced as the movement aggravated her wound. When she noticed Gu Ze reaching out to check her injury, she swatted his hand away, speaking in a cold tone.
"We've never even started, so of course it won't reach that point. Let's clearly draw the line here; from now on, we’ll go our separate ways and not disturb each other."
"Nuan."
In Gu Ze's eyes, there was only this woman he had almost lost. Even as she insisted on parting ways, his gaze remained fixed on her.
"I won't let you go, not ever."
Gu Ze pulled Xu Nuan up and embraced her tightly, pressing the knife into her hand.
"Unless you kill me right now, I will never let go. You chose to live in my heart, so I will never let you out. You can't escape."
"Such a stubborn person!"
Xu Nuan began to struggle again. After a few seconds of real effort, she could only rest her head on Gu Ze's shoulder, unable to do anything. The knife was in her hand, but she couldn't bring herself to use it.
"If you don't kill me now, you'll never escape."
He was such an unreasonable person, but how could she bring herself to kill him? In the moments when she had fought to escape, one of the thoughts that kept her alive was the desire to see this man again.
"If I want to escape, no one can stop me."
Xu Nuan had that confidence. Although Gu Ze was the greatest uncertainty in her life, she believed even more in her own abilities. Her confidence stemmed from her capabilities.
"I have never doubted that," he said, and she thought she heard his light laughter, though it might have been nothing at all. "But Nuan, I also believe in my abilities. I won't let you get away."
Hah!
Once again, Xu Nuan found herself unable to control the tears that streamed down her face. Through her blurred vision, she saw Gu Ze push her away and look directly into her eyes, slowly.
"Nuan, I love you."
"Marry me!"
Those four words felt like four years; every minute and second was excruciating. After enduring it all, an overwhelming fatigue swept over her, pulling her into a deep sleep. It was a slumber where she could vaguely hear the sounds of others arguing—both men and women. She couldn't make out the specifics of their quarrel, but it didn't bother her in her dreams. She remembered being on the Tundra, where the cold wind howled fiercely. Yet at that moment, she felt incredibly warm, as if a source of heat was continuously providing warmth to her.
So warm that she slept soundly, unaware of the passing time.
When Xu Nuan finally stirred awake, it was already deep into the night. Lying flat on her back, she could see the stars in the night sky forming a shimmering galaxy, each one dazzling and bright, with silver ribbons adorning the expanse above.
This was the first time she had the opportunity to truly appreciate the beauty of the night sky since entering this stage. The splendor of it almost made her forget everything that had happened in the past few days.
What had happened?
Xu Nuan suddenly sat up, only to be pulled back down by someone holding her. Shocked, she turned her head to see Gu Ze's sleeping face. Even in the dim moonlight, she could make out the slight hollowness of his eyes and the shadows beneath them.
This person really hadn’t rested well.
A pang of pain shot through Xu Nuan as memories flooded back. She had endured four hellish days, and it was only during her confrontation with Chi Ming that she encountered Gu Ze and his group. After killing Dong Keyong, Deng Yinyin had inadvertently exposed her knowledge of Chi Ming’s identity, leading to Chi Ming’s departure, while she had wanted to sever ties with Gu Ze completely.
She recalled arguing with Gu Ze at that moment, stabbing him once and then herself. Ultimately, she had fainted from a high fever just as Gu Ze confessed his feelings and proposed to her.
After that, she had been lost in a dream until waking up again at night, nestled in Gu Ze's embrace.
She was definitely not the one who initiated this. Xu Nuan felt a surge of indignation as she observed her surroundings. She realized they were sharing the same sleeping bag, with Gu Ze holding her tightly as he slept soundly. The others were also asleep in their own sleeping bags. She noticed they had returned to the Tundra, with a continuous range of mountains behind them and the eerie Special Tree stretching into the distance under the moonlight.
This Special Tree had carried them over a mountain peak and seemed endless. Xu Nuan felt a sense of confusion; they hadn't spent too long or too short in this stage so far. There were no missions, and beast attacks were minimal—just as simple as in previous stages.
Xu Nuan initially wanted to take advantage of her clarity to think things through carefully, but Gu Ze unconsciously snuggled closer to her, causing her to freeze instantly.
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